A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Hi I am an older lady who was in a relationship for 5 years. I do not drink or have any addictions. But use to many many years ago. My problem was i got into a relationhip that was so far so good but I had a hard time trusting him,( 2 bad realationships of abuse)kinda from about a month of going out. With finding girls numbers and ect. I talked to him about it and went off the handle. Then another time talked to the neighbour lady asking her where he was she said he was at work. ok. I said. This happened a couple of times. One night he was home so late i slapped his face. He had the right to kick me out, but we stayed together. I tried to work this out with counselling for a couple years it would be good but then it would happen again. I felt bad for him and myself for acting so stupid. Now it has been almost 2 years now it has come around to me he has been bad mouthing me telling every one in this very small town. I am embarrassed and people just look at me strangely. Like his friends and family. I want to move away but can't afford it.What should I do ? confront him? I have been now bad mouthing him too, and angry.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2012): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you to who all replied to me questioins.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (12 March 2012):
 I think you should act your age and quit acting like a junior high schooler. If you act like a class act, you'll be treated like a class act. This kind of gossip has a very short shelf life.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2012): I say head back to counselling. See if you need to be on medication to aid in controlling your mood swings, join some anger management classes.
You may not dry and sober but you still have the behaviours of an addict/alcoholic.
THEN, forgive, work, save up, and move on!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 March 2012): You should absolutely confront him, but also apologize for bad-mouthing him as well. You both should agree to put it all behind you and move on, its not worth the time or effort for either of you to be dwelling on past mistakes.
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