A
female
age
18-21,
anonymous
writes:I broke up with my best friend of three years/boyfriend of one year over the summer. It was hard at first but our close friendship seemed to pull through, and soon we were able to talk fairly normally again, even after I agreed to give a mutual friend of ours a chance with me romantically. My ex was raised in a strict religious home but went farther in our physical relationship than his morals should have allowed, and he started warning me about making the same mistakes again. After he all but called me a slut I firmly told him to stop imposing his views on me, which he agreed to. Then last month he saw me with my new bf's arm around my shoulders. He proceeded to call me and lecture me until I started crying. At the advice of my family and friends, I blocked his phone calls and relayed to him through his cousin that I didn't want to have anything to do with him for awhile to give us both time to recover. I know this was the right thing for us, but I can't help worrying that when the deadline I gave is up, we won't be able to even begin to pick up the pieces. Have I lost him forever by cutting him off like this? Is there any other option??
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female
reader, Ask oldersister + ♥, writes (5 November 2009):
 Anyone that dispenses a litany of verbal abuse at you is no friend, okay? Calling you over and over to lecture you is harrassment, it's what stalkers and people with borderline personality disorder do.
Just because he's "religious" doesn't mean he's above reproach and he participated in the same debauchery you did- he should be directing that at himself and not shifting blame and judgement. Must be some screwy, backwoods religion where no one takes any ownership or accountability for their actions- nice moral values, that family. I'd stay away from the lot of them. That's not what religion is about.
Why don't you tell your new boyfriend what happened and see how he reacts. Tell any one of your friends and they'll think you're out of your tree for wanting this guy back in your life. Write a letter to his parents about all the dirty acts you guys performed and maybe they'll beat him with the bible and not let him leave the house- that way he won't see you with your boyfriend anymore and have nothing to harrass you about.
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