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female
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anonymous
writes: I have been going out with my bf now for 2 years. Just the other day I found some porno mags under the bed while having a spring clean in my flat. He often stys over but I've never seen or known that he reads or looks at porn. I didn't find it a shock as most men look at porn right? What I did find a shock though was as I picked the mags up a piece of paper fell out with a list of names and telephone numbers on of massage parlours and a company called Dungeons and Dragons. Not really sure what this all means. How do I approach him with this information? I thought he was sexually satisfied in the relationship and we were getting on fine. What do I do??Thanks all, any advice truly appreciated. x
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male
reader, maxsteel86  +, writes (20 July 2006):
 Firstly about the porn thing, a lot of women aren't happy about their guys watching porn so if you dont like it dont think you're alone on it (thats if you dont like it).
Secondly, numbers to massage parlours? What are they, massage parlours? Dont see any problems with getting a massage...
Just kidding:-P yeah talk to him about it and find out. If it wasn't in his handwriting, then maybe the magazines were borrowed and someone else had them down. Though thats a lot of ifs! Ask him straight out and be honest how you feel and tell him what you think.
And if he accuses you of snooping, it'll show that he's just angry at being caught out. Kick his butt out!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 July 2006): firstly on the porn issue, i personally see no problem with porn as i watch it with my boyfriend and if anything i enjoy it as much as him, however, when the list of massage parlours does seems suspicious.
i think the only way you're going to find out the truth is to confront him. there could be an innocent explanation like he borrowed the porn from someone else and the list was already in it - is it in his handwriting? but it could be what you fear and he has/is straying...
i really think the only way u will find out the truth is to just be up front, it's not like uv snooped and found it - it was under your bed so you have every right to know what's going on. just come straight out with it, trust me in my experience it's the only way to get the truth
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