A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my husbend for 12 years now but it's been in the last 2 or 3 years he dont want to touch me or have sex with me anymore I know he's not cheating so pleas help me under stand why or if thare is something Wong with me Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2012): His libido may have dropped. I've heard some men have this happen when they get to be middle aged. Have you tried asking him what changed? Does he refuse to talk about it? If so, my guesses are either he's embarrassed about his loss of libido, he's hiding something, (like how often he masturbates to porn), you or him have gained a lot of weight in the last few years, or he's having health issues that haven't yet been diagnosed.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (24 October 2012):
 what's changed in the last 2 or 3 years?
if nothing has changed with you perhaps he's suffering from LOW-T has he had a medical work up?
if not have you ASKED him... "is everything ok with US?"
not HIM, not "are YOU ok" because clearly he's functioning... but "are WE ok?"
My husband has gained a lot of weight in the last year... and it makes him feel unsexy and has seriously reduced his sex drive... but it's NOT me... it's him... and this may not be YOU it may be him.
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A
male
reader, tamperingtampaguy +, writes (24 October 2012):
Men sometimes disrespect a huge weight gain. I do not know if that is the case but it could be. Weight gain could be telling your man that you do not care about him enough to at least be in somewhat good shape. A few lbs might be ok, but a big weight gain , going into the obesity category , might not be. Communicate with your husband or try counseling whether it is weight gain or not.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2012): Maybe his libido has gone down. Have you tried talking to him? He might need medication or for you to try spicing things up. You could also try changing your look (dye/cut hair, new clothes, start working out, etc.), or maybe try new things in the bedroom... this link has a lot of good ideas.
http://www.ivillage.com/20-ways-spice-your-sex-life/4-a-283583
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