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anonymous
writes: Agony AuntThere is this girl in my form who keeps flirting with me. I really hate her but don't know what to do or say that won't hurt her feelings. I heard she was going to ask me out, but what can I say when she does? If i say yes all my mates will laugh at me and if I say no she will be offended. I am 12, she is 11 and her mates are egging her on. I'm sure I have not told my mates. What Should I Do???????????
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A reader, olivia, writes (12 March 2005): Do not say yes. Tell her how you feel, but not hurt her feelings. Tell her in a nice way "I don't like you, but there are other boys that might".
A reader, Ali, writes (7 March 2005): You could try sitting down and having a conversation with her about how you feel, but be gentle with your words so not to upset her. Or if you don't feel brave enough in confronting her try sitting down and thinking about why you hate her. How has she upset you? Should you get to know her first before you reach this conclusion.Deep down she could be a really nice sensitive girl. But at the end of the day follow your own advice, because your advice is no better than anyone elses.
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A reader, RIZZY RIZZ, writes (7 March 2005): HI!Instead of saying hate, say you dislike her. I know growing up is hard. Please. I'm in the 11 grade and kids still act like they are 12 .(LOL) Here's what you can do. If you don't want all the kids to hear whar you and her are saying, try pulling her to the side by herself and let her know that she's a pretty good girl but you're just not ready to have a girlfriend yet. Even still, you should not care what your friends say because you know what? They are going to be going through the same thing that you are. And instead of makeing the right choice they are going to make the wrong choice by laughing at the girl that likes them,or by calling her names. REMEMBER THIS. A 12 year old girl with a 12 year old mind is not going to stay 12 forever,A 12 YEAR OLD BOY WITH A 12 YEAR OLD MIND IS NOT GOING TO STAY 12 FOREVER EITHER. Maybe in 3 years you will be in middle school and 3 years after that you will be in high school you wont be 12 any more; you will be 17 or 18 years old, so at this age you don't wont to disrespect your female friends because you dont know how they will look or turn out to be. You might even fall in love with her in middle school or high school and by that time it will be too late cuz that girl that you was making fun of or made her cry will remember the pain and hurt you brought her and turn you down.So be nice when you say sorry but iam not ready to have a girlfriend yet and keep it that way.dont tell your friends what you and her was talking about. GOOD LUCK,RIZZY RIZZ
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A reader, sarah, writes (6 March 2005): Dear Feels Like, First of all,I just want to say that you are a REALLY nice person for not wanting to offend her even though you hate her.I am in love with a guy who cannot STAND me,and you can bet he lets the whole world know! I think that you should just follow your heart.I mean,just ask yourself:would it REALLY be that big of a tragedy if your friends laughed at you? If you STILL don't want to date her,just tell her gently.Say that you think she's a REALLY nice person,but you just want to be friends.Best wishes,Sarah
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