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Don't want to lose her because of guilt!

Tagged as: Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (19 February 2010) 4 Answers - (Newest, 13 March 2010)
A male Philippines age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Hi. I am 18 and my girlfriend is 17. We already had sex, but it's been a year since we started and now we only done it like 8 times. But we do things like oral sex and other pleasurable things. I know it's wrong, but we can't stop ourselves from refraining from those things, but after we do it, we were like thinking about it and feeling guilty. I dont want to loose her because of this, please help me, give me advices to avoid those things. we are in the age of easily getting hot at most times. and i dont want to become a father this early.. but most important, i dont wanther to leave me because of her guilt about those things. please guve advices to avoid those things. and how can i make our relationship start over again? like forgetting what happened to us and be happy... :(

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (13 March 2010):

thanks to your replies. it really helped me think. and we talked about it. thanks. sorry for my late thanks.

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A female reader, Ich_liebe_dich Philippines +, writes (20 February 2010):

Ich_liebe_dich agony auntBy the way i forgot to say, having a baby is not the super glue of the relationship, sometimes it is the reason why relationship broke up because of too much strees and responsabilities., so better keep an eye on that. DONT GET PREGNANT. you two will have a good life if you two prepare everything FIRST in the future before get into the BIG responsabilities. Good luck anyway...

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A female reader, Ich_liebe_dich Philippines +, writes (20 February 2010):

Ich_liebe_dich agony auntJuts let her use birth control or anything that avoid pregnancy everything will be ok. This is normal at this age, its the first step to grow up. As long you two thinking of the future everything will be ok. Let your two feelings go dont control it, JUST CONTROL GETTING HER PREGNANT.. thats the most IMPORTANT things at all..

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A reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2010):

No, no, no- this is all wrong! If you both love each other (and it sounds that way from your post), then this is something completely natural and nothing to feel ashamed/guilty of.

Due to porn and many other things, I think many cultures look at it as something "filthy" when in reality sex is a beautiful and natural thing made for two people who love each other to enjoy. There is NOTHING wrong with it!

Just make sure you take the necessary precautions. Always, always, always use a condom! If your girlfriend can get on birth control, that would be great (double protection!).

What you need to do is sit down with your girlfriend, somewhere private where it's just the two of you and talk seriously one on one about this problem you're having. Tell her there is nothing that she should feel guilty or ashamed of of, as you love her very much and would never use her just for sex. Your relationship goes much beyond that. Reassure her that you love her and that sex is just a natural thing that occurs in relationships.

I'm an 18 year old female and my boyfriend is the same age. We have only been with eachother and we both enjoy it very much. I don't look at it as just "sex" but as love making and it can be very passionate and beautiful. Please don't feel ashamed about anything! Be confident in your own skin and love your girlfriend the best way you can! :-) Wish you the best. Hope I could somehow help you with this problem! Take care.

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