A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:do you think is it disrespectful for a guy dancing with any girl in the club while he has a girlfriend?and telling his girlfriend" hey baby im going out with my boys, then ofcourse i'm not gonna dance with my boys over there, only dance, but not even more than that" do you think is that disrespect?
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you all of you guys.. he told me even though he goes to night club, he will not dance... but ofcourse i will not believe him.. instead of telling me the truth, he will lie...
and he told me: oh bachata and merengue not that type of dancing touching body... i really dont agree and told him" if u dont want another girl dancing and touchin ur body, so u should be dancing by yourself not with the girls.
and he laughed at me... i dont think from now on he will tell me the truth otherwise why he would fight with me? him dancing with the girls idea?
A
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2011): It depends how he's dancing... if they're all just having fun and enjoying the music, fine, but if he's touching the girl while they're dancing, then that crosses a line.
If you've explicitly told him you don't like him dancing with other girls, he should respect that. However, if he's dancing in a group and there are girls joining them, it shouldn't be a problem. It's his attitude to you about it though that matters.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2011): If he has told you he will be dancing, then i dont think its being disrespectful. There isnt much else you can do at a club. Its not the same as going to a bar with friends to catch up and have a drink.It might be making you feel uncomfortable because guys usually want to dance with women they have scoped out and find attractive. And if they are drinking too it can be a dangerous game. If it really worries you, maybe suggest some rules for you both when out clubbing apart. Make an agreement about the amount you can both drink and the level of body contact you have with others. I know quite a few girls and guys who find clubbing apart a deal breaker, because of how some carry on while drinking and dancing. So if you decide you find it unacceptable for him to go off clubbing without you, you wont be alone.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2011): It depends on you, your girlfriend, and the kind of dancing. I know the thought of my girl grinding all over another guy disturbs me but I've always kind of been the jealous type. It all just depends on the kind of person you and her are and what it is that makes each of you feel loved.We did this whole 5 love languages thing and one of mine was physical touch so it obviously bothers me if she touches anyone else because that my love language directed toward someone else. Hers was quality time so she would be upset if I was spending genuine quality time with other person but wouldn't have such a problem if I danced with someone. If you think about what makes her happy you should be able to tell what would make her upset.
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female
reader, themagentskie +, writes (28 April 2011):
 Not really. It's basically what the point of a club is. To interact and forget about troubles. He's at least being honest with you and telling you, unlike most men.
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A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (28 April 2011):
 I don't, personally. I'll dance with girls while I'm in a relationship, and I don't mind if the girl I'm with goes out dancing, either. We know who's coming home to who.But it's not what I think. Are *you* comfortable with him going out dancing? If not, say so. He gave you the opportunity to do so. There's no shame in it, as long as you're honest with each other.If you're uncomfortable but don't say so, it would be disingenuous of you to pretend you're alright with it. In that case, you couldn't blame him for doing it,e specially after he told you that was his plan. Say so. If you already let him do it, tell him now that you thought you were alright, but really weren't, and don't want him to go dancing without you. I'm sure he'll understand.
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