A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:HiNeed some advice. Am mid 50's and had a boyfriend for over 4 years - we were happy and got engaged but then the last two years not been great. I work full time, he is retired and I have a very busy life, and find I do not have a lot of time to give him. He is getting fed up with this and wants me all to himself all the time - I look after an elderly relative and just cannot go away on 2 weeks holiday like he wants me too. I like my own company and kept busy on my days off! I am a much more stronger emotional person - he is pretty needy in this department. I just want to know that I am doing the right thing in finishing it.... Would I be lonely ??? Any advice is welcome.Thanks,
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWell thanks for your answer. You are right although he does have a couple of friends he just wants to be with me every hour of the day and he does make me feel real bad that I go and see my sons/grandaughter/mother etc etc. I can make friends easily and he can't - so I guess he is perhaps jelous as well of me in a weird kind of way. You're right I won't get lonely !
A
female
reader, AuntyEm +, writes (14 June 2009):
 It's hard to say if you would be lonely. If you split with him, I am sure there would be lots of things you would miss about him, but it's no reason to stay in a relationship if your truly unhappy. People stay for all sorts of reasons and often lose sight of the primary goal, which is to find true love and companionship, if you don't have that then maybe it's time to call it a day...loneliness is no reason to stay where you are unhappy.
It's not unreasonable for him to want to spend more time with you, in fact, it's quite lovely, but he must also accept that you have other commitments. Maybe you could get some respite care for your care role and take a holiday with him...I am sure you could use a break as care work is tough!!
Wanting to spend time on your own is not unreasonable either, but if it's getting to the stage where you want to be on your own most of the time, it's probably also another reason to quit...but in the long run, you could regret it!!!
Best of luck to you and I hope you come to a happy conclusion.
Aunty Em xxx
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A
female
reader, misswalston  +, writes (14 June 2009):
 I don't think you will be lonely. You need to find someone that is compatible with you. You have a full life and that is wonderful, but unfortunately your boyfriend doesn't and it doesn't seem like he is trying to busy himself while you are doing what you have to do. Does he have any male friends he can hang out with? He needs a life with you and without you meaning that when you two are not together he needs to find other focuses and not make you feel bad about not being under him 24 hours of the day......... A woman with your energy and zest for life will never be lonely.......
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