A
male
age
36-40,
*oodguy11
writes:OK so I started to talk to this girl on yahoo poker for months now. She is really beautiful but I wanted to be just a friend. She seems so sweet and perfect and the more I talked to her I just couldn't stop myself from liking her more than a friend. She fits into almost every category that I look for in a girl. We have so much in common. What started out as an innocent internet buddy chat started to make me believe again that destiny does exist. She lives in Chicago and I live in Miami and yet she's been here before and she loves it down here. She rarely gets online but in the time that we do talk we make each other laugh a lot and share our past experiences. She never asked for my picture because I've been waiting for her to ask and I have to say I am an attractive guy. So here's the dilema now. This girl is very gorgeous I mean almost every guy goes gaga for her. She's single by choice and she just got out of a bad relationship of 4 years. We have been talking until we hit a wall. A few weeks ago I've been talking to her friend in real life and she found out that we've been talking. Now her friend is very sweet and fun but I ONLY see her as a friend. She asked her if we've been talking about her and for being a good honest friend she said yes. She got super mad. Of course She told her the truth that we're just friends and that she never betrayed her trust which she hasn't because she never told me any secrets or private info. It was always me telling her friend how wonderful I think she is. Well I waited a week for her to cool off and she was ignoring me on im and on yahoo poker. So I wrote her an email telling her the truth of what me and her friend been talking about her and that I care about her and I would like for us to continue talking. Well she hasn't responded with anything. I even told her if she wants me to back off then say something. She hasn't blocked me or told me to back off so I don't know if thats a good sign. It's been a week now since the email so is this just something she'll eventually get over and keep talking to me. I did nothing wrong and I'm not sure why she's upset. But it hurts not talking to her but I'll be ok. Honestly I want her to get a b/f so I can move on. But I keep thinking that she's everything I want in a girl that we have so many things in common its spooky. I mean I know what she's been through and she knows what I've been through. I need a girl to support me and give me confidence in myself and I know she wants a guy to give her the emotional attention that she needs not just the physical part. I am romantic and spontaneous and definitely random. I know if I had the chance I can make it work and make her very happy. But the problem is getting that chance. We're both at a point of our lives that we're looking for something serious and ready to settle down. We're both exactly what we need. I see it but she doesn't and even her friend tells me she needs a guy just like me in her life. I mean I definitely don't want to be in a long distance relationship because the're plenty of beautiful of women in Miami. But she is so different and I can't help that if fate is trying to tell me something then I would fight for her. I don't know what to do can you guys help.
View related questions:
confidence, long distance, move on Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, goodguy11 +, writes (4 February 2010):
goodguy11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWhat I want right now is to get to know her more because I do like her. She told me before that she's investing in getting to know me. When I met her I was facing the fact that I almost lost my mom so it was a tough time for me but she was there when I needed a laugh. I think I'm starting to feel bad for talking about her behind her back. I didn't mean to hurt her. If I like her then I think she should be the first to know and not her friend. You're right I have to be honest with her and honest about my intentions.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2010): First off, make up your mind. You say you want her. Then you say you don't want to be in a long distance relationship because.. of all the women in Miami you want to hook up with? Make up your mind, which one is it, the online girl or the nearby hook-ups?
You also say you are attractive. She hasn't asked our picture. Number one reason girls dont ask to see pictures online is because we really dont care. She doesn't sound like she's into you, and this sounds very one sided. Also, if you think you're so attractive, why would you need her to build up your confidence? And as for that: never rely one someone else to bring you what you need in life! All you'll end up as is a needy and clingy boyfriend.
Why is she mad? You talked about her behind her back. Not all people care, but some care, and she's one of those people who care. I am too, thats why Im telling you this. When my boyfriend and a former close friend of mine talked behind my back, it was hurtful. Because she went ahead and told him stuff about me thats not really true, and he believed her, and so he kept secrets from me because my "friend" advised him to not tell me. Talking behind someones back can be hurtful, especially if she's experienced it before and it wasn't a pleasant memory. No matter how innocent your conversations with her friend were.
She'll get over it though. If she cares about you. If she doesnt contact you at all it is a sign that she never really cared about you as anything more than a nickname on yahoo.
If you want to try and make a go for it, and have her as your girlfriend: be honest with her! Invite her out on a "date" online and be honest about your intentions. Then see if she accepts.
...............................
|
