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anonymous
writes: I have been dating Ant for seven years, living together for 6 ½ years and got engaged 3 years ago. Everything has been going great until 4 months ago. He started acting a bit distant (not as affectionate)& told me that he didn’t know what he wanted out of this relationship. We still live together & do things together like any other couple and it’s not like he goes out at all. I have spoken to him and asked him if he needed space or if there was someone else his answer was no and that he loves me very much but is confused. Just recently I brought up the subject and asked him what was going on with us & his answer was 'I still don’t know. I am still thinking about it' so I told him what am I, on hold? What the hell his wrong with you either we are getting married, breaking up or what? He just simply said don’t worry I am not going anywhere. Can someone tell me what the hell is his problem????? I am confused!!!!
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reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2005): I say give him his space. Men do need that without being hounded especially if he says he is not going anywhere. Spend time on yourself a little. It will take some of the pressure off of him if he knows you are happy doing things on you own a little. It's a natural process people go thru and its how you deal with it that determines the end.
A reader, Jess, writes (8 March 2005): Sounds to me that its not about you, it's about him. You may of heard that all the time but it's true! He probably feels he misses out on something or he needs to do something with himself! The problem is that he doesn't know wha'ts wrong himself so for now there's nothing you can do but be patient and if you love him be prepared to wait for him!
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A reader, Christy, writes (8 March 2005): Well if it were me, I'd stop making myself so available. Pick up some hobbies, do nice things for yourself. Suggest couples therapy if he really wants to make this work. You don't deserve to be treated like this. Staying around only shows him that it is ok to treat you like this and it isn't.
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