A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I know a really nice Asian Indian girl who asked me to "become" her brother.Which is fine, because there's always been a platonic relationship going on.. but I'm worried that once that happens, I'm not even sure how it would work in future .. I don't know how the human mind works, never having had a sister myself, and I don't want to be having thoughts which I would later have to regret.I've known this whole silly idea among Indian and Chinese girls, where they take up any random guy as their brother, and among Hindu Indians, they even make some religious thing out of it.... I'm not sure if "accepting" somebody as your brother or sister is the same as actually being somebody's brother or sister.I believe what might really happen is that our friendship is going to get ruined.. I mean an inappropriate remark might be forgiven among friends, but when it comes to being "brothers and sisters", it will bring with it a whole new set of complications, and an effective end to any further communication.I don't like to get into this, but I don't have the heart to refuse either..Any thoughts, experiences or advice would be more than welcome.. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you, Red Green 0289. I think that was it.. to imply that we can be close, but never as lovers.. Although I'm not too happy about her closing my options in that respect. Besides, given her and my circumstances, I would never have approached her anyway.Be that as it may, my update is that I have accepted. Let me see where it goes from here..
A
male
reader, Red Green 0289  +, writes (27 February 2010):
Unless I'm missing something, it's symbolic- you're not a blood relative, but a very close friend of the family. We have a few freinds like this, they always join for holidays, and we accept them as if they are family (we consider them so). If they need us, we're there for them. You will have to ask people in your community what the implication of this agreement is, but I suspect that long them it is nothing.Is there any chance that what she's really trying to do is formalize that you two are simply freinds, and never going to be lovers? I have no idea...
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