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Are we breaking up, or just taking a break?

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (26 September 2005) 1 Answers - (Newest, 27 September 2005)
A male , anonymous writes:

My girlfriend and I are on the verge of breaking up. We have been together for close to two years. Our stages in life are different. She has her career started and I don't have a steady job. We live together and she pays for all the bills until I get on my feet. She says that she needs space and get her life back on track.

She's planning on moving back to her parents' place by the end of this week. She says she loves me, but why can't we try and work it out without the moving?

I don't know if this is a soft way of leaving me for good, or just temporary. She still wants to be friends, what do I do? Any or all help would be appreciated.

View related questions: a break, needs space

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A female reader, laurette +, writes (27 September 2005):

Sometimes people in a relationship need to have a break, the first 2 years are the hardest in every relationship and as yours is coming into the 2nd year it could just be the case that your partner needs a break, it can sometimes be the best thing for a relationship, on the other hand it might be a way of ending things.

I left my partner after 2and a half years because our situations was much like yours, i needed a break and the stress of being the bread winner was too much and there was a few things i had to deal with in myself and things my partner needed to deal with himself, we we're seperated for 2 years but we did get back together and now we've been together for almost 6 years and just got engaged , so sometimes the outcome is good.

Begging her to stay or contacting her all the time will make her feel she is making the right decission, what you have to do now is give her the space she needs whilst you consentrate on getting yourself a new steady job and make her see that you can be in control. It's a funny thing but us women like to chase a man and we like men who are in control( not too much though) . So take control of your life now if you want this women back in your life, it might be her way of telling you that she needs you to be responsible for her now. stay friend during the seperation, suggest meeting up for lunch etc... show her that you have what it takes to be the man of her dreams and make her want you more..

There is no point crying over spilt milk as the saying goes now you have to make her want you back but ask yourself a few question for instance, before she made this decission, was there any problems? where you both argueing all the time? did you go both go out together? has their been any cheating in the relationship? and think of way to prevent it happeneing again if you get back together or even if you meet someone else.

Once you find out what has went wrong work on how you can fix it or change it. For her to have made this decission there has to have been something bothering her for some time.

As i said stay friends and concentrate on getting yourself a job and stability because this seems to be what she was missing.

good luck and i hope this work out for you.

If it doesn't remember there are plenty more girls out there and alwasy be positive about yourself.

laurette

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