| A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: My gf broke up with me over two days ago. . .yet I think im already over it. We were together for over a year and we sure did have our fair share of problem. I did like her alot. . .even potentially could love her. Somehow though, somewhere along our relationship, it felt like I was putting 90% into the r-ship and she only 10%.It really got tiring and I began to feel like it wasn't worth it. Still, I tried my best to make her see how much I wanted her. All my efforts were in vain, she broke up with me recently.I'll admit, I felt a sharp pain in my chest when she dropped the bomb on me. But after a few days, I feel like I'm over her. I feel like I'm better off without her. You would think this a good thing and what the hell my problem is. I'm worried I might be in denial. Is it possible to get over someone so quickly? I've already deleted everything that reminds me of her. I've nearly thrown out all thoughts of her calling me again. I'm almost smiling thinking of a future without her. . .even though I had strong feelings for her. Whats wrong with me?Am I just bluffing myself?
View related questions:
broke up Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, llifton  +, writes (18 June 2013):
 i think you're perfectly great and fine. i think you're just being really rational and adult about this. you spent so much time and effort trying to please this woman, all to no avail. and it was no doubt emotionally draining. i'm sure it's a breath of fresh air to not have to worry anymore. it's freeing, honestly.
i've been there before. been with someone where i tried and tried and put forth so much effort to make them happy and it never worked in the end. once i was away, i realized just how much happier i truly was.
i wouldn't second-guess yourself at all. sounds like you're doing great. :)
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2013): This is the Original Poster
Thank you for your responces.
...............................
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (17 June 2013):
 I think your submittal makes it clear that you were never really "IN" to her.... so it's not surprising that you were able to "get over her" rather quickly when she pulled the trigger and told you that the two of you needed to go your separate ways.....
Believe me... when you find THAT GIRL who really "floats your boat" ... and the two of you have a parting.... you will feel listless, lethargic, nauseated and suicidal for weeks - maybe months - following the breakup. Heck, I'm still pining for that cheerleader, from HIGH SCHOOL, who dumped me like yesterday's chicken bones....
Good luck.... (you're NORMAL, after all!!!!!)
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2013): This is the original poster.
Thank you Spanner28, I don't feel sad anymore, at least not completely.
I feel there's no point in having feelings for someone who won't return them. I've also been in other relationships before so I know once it ends, you're only wasting your time in moping around, waiting for her to change her mind. Life is too short for that .
I also feel that if she's strong enough to forget about me, then I, as a man, should be just as strong in doing the same thing. I don't mean for that to sound sexist. I just feel I shouldn't be more emotionally vulnerable than a woman. I just wanted to make sure I'm not bluffing myself.
Those are my reasons for moving on so quickly
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (17 June 2013): Well yeah it's well possible, I've gotten over relationships in that time. But I was already done with them for months before we officially ended so emotionally I'd already spent time getting to the point of not being with her. So when it ended it just felt like the right thing to do.
It's only been two days though, it's also possible it hasn't hit you yet what not being with her means or maybe it just doesn't seem final yet.
It's not unusual to be over a relationship even before it ends OP, just don't fool yourself into thinking it only took two days for you to get over it, you'd been spending months growing frustrated and tired of this and frankly it sounds like you started your grieving long ago when you first realized this relationship wasn't for you.
...............................
|
