A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I've been with my girlfriend for 3 months now, and things are going so great for us. I enjoy every moment we spend together, and when we're apart, she's always on my mind. This is both of ours first relationship that's been even remotely serious. I see no faults in her whatsoever, and I find her remarkably beautiful inside and out. I always have butterflies around her, and when we kiss, I get chills. I feel truly at home when we're together.But all of these things could just be silly teenage romance symptoms. We're both seniors in high school. I'm 17 and she's 18. I understand that due to my young age and lack of prior experience as far as long term relationships, I am naive to these feelings. How can I tell if this is love or just a strong attraction? I feel like it might be love, but I don't want to tell her that I love her and have those feelings change if it turns out that I really didn't. I'm just confused and want everything to go smoothly with this amazing girl.And in the event that this is really love, how should I go about telling her? Should I tell her right off the bat? Or should I wait until I'm certain that her feelings are reciprocated? I wouldn't want to put her on the spot if she didn't feel the same way, and after all, 3 months is a short, short time to be in a relationship: perhaps not long enough for her to develop the same feelings that I have.Any sort of feedback would truly help me.Thank you. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 September 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI forgot that I had this question on here.
Here is a follow up:
Everything was great for 6 months, until she freaked out during a trip to the coast.
What's awful is that during that trip, (3 months after posting this question) I felt the most complicated feeling in the world, recognized it as love, and thought it was going to be amazing.
But she pretty much made it the worst experience ever.
We're still friends and hang out frequently, but things will never be the same.
I miss her, honestly. But what's done is done, and there's no changing it.
Trust me, I've tried.
Thanks for the help though.
A
female
reader, visione +, writes (1 February 2010):
 Ooh how lucky. :) You should definitely continue what you have now and it take it slow when it comes to saying "I love you"... there's no rush!
I hope college goes well for the two of you!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 February 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the response.
Yes, the two of us will be attending the same university in just about 8 months.
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A
female
reader, visione +, writes (1 February 2010):
If you question whether you love her or not, then you should wait awhile before saying anything. When you feel it completely you should have no doubts. It sounds like you are very much 'in like' with her, and like you said, 3 months is not a long time.
Are you two going to the same university/college? This can be a true test of your love for each other if you are not. Also be wary that many people change throughout college simply because they meet new people, make new friends, learn new things, etc...
I applaud you for asking about this and really thinking about it (and respecting how she might react as well) - many people use those three words incorrectly.
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