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male
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*ranzlogic
writes: I have fallen completely in love with my girlfriend and she says she loves me too and talks of nothing but our future. Over time baggage from her past has haunted us more and more leading to more heated arguments. i came back from a 2 week vacation a few weeks ago and nothing has been right since. Constant bickering and arguing on her part. She has been making sexual refrences about a friend of mine aswell. We got into a big fight and things got heated due to emotion and I grabbed her and left bruises from holding so tight. She then got me arrested and now wont speak to me. I cant contact her n any way..she has to do it. What do I do? The thought of never talking to her again is making me break down and thoughts of suicide are present. I just dont know what to do!
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male
reader, rolfen  +, writes (23 November 2010):
 Seriously, she got you arrested? Dude! Find someone nicer.
Maybe she also feels trapped and has trouble dealing with it, so it's her way to getting space.
In any case, keep your head high. You have to. Keep your spirits high.
Maybe it'll be ok.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 February 2006): i understand how u feel...i just got into a big fight with my gf and we've broken up finally, after so many fights. I felt so sad, dead, lifeless, silent that we we may never b back together again. It's so hard to believe that the person that u loved and did anything 4 can just abandon u. But a big lesson that i learned about one saving the relationship is not all the time worth the while. I need some advise aswell...i guess we'll have to give them time. And if you're like me that doesn't give time just go 4 it and don't look back...u can make the change and get back together again but let me warn u that i dont guarantee u that everything will b back together again "perfect" like most couples expect it to b. It will take time...
Farewell,
This is Sinister_angel_4
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A
female
reader, Angel Underneath +, writes (3 January 2006):
You can't contact her so unless she gets in touch with you then you have to leave it. In the mean time , why not get some counselling to deal with any suicidal feeling and also the violence. If you do start talking to each other again then if you are getting help for your violence then perhaps she will see that you are willing to seek help to change
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A
female
reader, AgonyAuntsonEBAY +, writes (3 January 2006):
 Please ring Samaritans on 08457 90 90 90 straight away. You are a good man and life is worth living. Please talk to them - they are lovely people.
We all feel for you - please let us know what happens.
Do not contact her for a while until things have settled down. You both need time to sort things out.
I know it will work out for the best for both of you.
X
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A
female
reader, kellyO  +, writes (3 January 2006):
 Hi dear, my advise is that u need to stay with family and friends.
She doesnt seem to want u to contact her now and there is nothing u can do.
U said here u cant contact her, and i really dont think that it is advisable right now anyway.The last confrontation between the two of u ended up with the involvement with the police. U need time urself to deal with all the problems in the relationship. U did admit there was alot of bickering and arguing on her part. I know she exhibited her own faults but u also u need to realise your own faults in the relationship too and learn from them. It shouldnt make u down but should encourage u to seek for improvements for the better u which we all aim to be.
You said u have thoughts of suicide. That is sad really. no one should have such power over u. i have had a bad relationship myself and i have chosen to move on with my life and make it better. that is what u should aim to do if she doesnt contact u again. To make her feel your life still had meaning without her and u still found love.
Please seek friends and stay with family for support. Get that suicide thought off your head. You arent the only one going through this. i have been through hell myself and alot of people too. I moved on and i know u can too. maybe she will still call wait for her if she doesnt is her lost!
All the best dear.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2006): It sounds to me like your girlfriend is controlling you. I would steer well clear. She is messing with your life as well as your feelings. She is obviously very insecure and unstable and is putting all this on you. Do you really want someone like this in your life? You have to look at your relationship as if you are on the outside. How would you feel if one of your friends was treated like this?
You want someone who makes you feel happy, motivated and special. Her actions have shown that she is self absorbed and isnt thinking of you. Move on. There is always someone out there round the corner who is more well suited. You need to be confident and boost your self esteem. Try taking your mind off things by doing what you love. You will soon find that you will be much happier when you are free from her negativity.
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