A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:I had an afair with a man that was married for four years. well 3yrs ago it ended. He had got a divorce just amonth before we split. Then he discovers he has Leukimia and is hospitalized for weeks. we had everything in common loved to fish ride harleys grill out and loved to be around each other, laughed alot!well after he got out of the hospital he went back to his family and wife.he said to me "I will always love you, remember that!" he moved out while I was at work . I I still can't get over him i think of him everyday for 3 years. I just want to get over this but like everyone says no one compares to what we have had.I am dating a man and trying to move on but its not working. What can I do?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2009): if you are suffering imagine his poor wife. she know that he had an affair with you. you see not only mistresses suffer, wives do so too. she has had to nurse him and take care of his needs while ill. it was not fair to her too. sometimes we only look at our problems, what about the problems we cause others. in this case his wife.this man did not love you, he merely pacified you and moved on. he used you for the moment and when it really mattered he choose his real love. it is sad it was not you but his choice skpoke volumes. so many times the other woman thinks the wife pressuries the hb to stay with her but what lovers/mistresses do not get is this - the man chooses and he blames the wife. it makes the lover/mistress feel good to think that her married man did not up and leave on his own but was pressurised. what nonsense. he leaves beacuse he wants to. he makes the choice but is too much of a coward to admit what he wants. lovers/mistresses always fall for this cop out. it is not fair to your current man in your life. if you still need time to move on then you must now let go of the new man. in time you will be ready for another commitment. but please make sure he is unattached. it will save so much of drama and pain.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2009): Short terms affairs hurt more then long terms cause it leave less causes to forget. Get online with some sort of group or online addiction with some sort of RPG .... :P would rather work I hope, you could try secondlife.com or There.com. See if works for you.
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A
female
reader, narnia  +, writes (6 July 2009):
 dear writer,
You must remeber thew reasons why you broke up in the first place, and the circumstances in which you met. Having an affair with a married man is an awful thing to do! And he must not be an incrediably sincere person to commit adultery in the first place. I think the main reason why you are finding it so hard letting go of him is because of his illness and you may be affraid of losing him completely. You should seriously try and move on with your life. x
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