A
female
age
30-35,
kaysha
writes:hey guys im 15 years old and i really want children, i have a part time job in year 10. when im not working or going to school im watchen childrena and i have been since i was 8 years old id cook dinner clean the house. the ages i normaly whatch in the week after school or on the weekeneds when im not working i what 12 year old , 9, 7 , 5, 4, 3, to 2 year olds, 18 mounth old, and some time a 4 mounth old . i love children they are my hole life i reallly just want one of my own im not a normal teenager i dnt go out with friends all the time and i have a boyfriend he is a wonderful guy i love him so much and i never want us to be apart he doesnt really want chidren at the moment and my perents dont like the idea but they both say to me if it happens it happens and if it doesnt well it doesnt but they both say they will not be happy because of my age but my mum says she knows im a great with kids and to have one of my own would be great i no there is times were its hard but its my dream.. please every-one that reads this please say something back !!!! thankyou for reading my story...
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female
reader, jessica2811  +, writes (15 February 2008):
 I think it is totally wrong for a girl of your age wanting children. You can think of children when you have a brill job and with the right person. Yeah i want children too but not now while I am in school. Get yourself a job and someone who loves you then you can think of children!
A
female
reader, LoveMyadvice  +, writes (13 February 2008):
Dear Girl, You really need to read this, you sound like a very smart and matture young girl that loves children. BUT - you are far too young! And I am not trying to critisize you, I wish I was able to get in your brain to understand ALL the responsibilities that you will have for the rest of your life. Not only when you are watching them for someone, you get to play with them, feed them, baby them all those cute things that kids love to do when they are playing 'house' but that's not reality!!! I can say this from my own experience, I have four children, and I was a teen mother when I was 16 I became pregnant. I thought everything that you wrote, I loved kids, I had a boyfriend, that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and NEVER would of imagined raising these kids on my own. In my wildest dreams, I never imagined him walking out on me and OUR children. Shortly after I had my first child, we got married. He filled that void for me, so did my baby. I loved her so much, I took very good care of her. I was so young, and so living in a fantasy world, because I kept having babies, and almost 5 years later, pregnant from my fourth child, he walked out on me, he met this other woman, and left us. I know you can say that this is not going to happen to you, but that's what I thought. I use to hear all those stories of Guys leaving their family, or getting a divorce, and I wouldn't even think twice that that could be me one day. He was my world, he was my best friend ( I thought) he never showed any signs of not loving me or his children. He was my first everything, but he left and he never looked back. It's been almost 6 years and he's never asked to see our kids that he has together. Not only was my heart and soul shattered, but he left at the hardest time of my life. All my kids were age 5 years old and younger, I had not money, I wasn't working, I had to rely on other people helping me, I was a high school drop-out, no work experience, barely life experience, I had to move in with my mom and stay in one room with all three kids and pregnant and I was devistated. It was the hardest thing that I'd ever went through in my life, I had to find myself, I had to raise myself while raising four kids at the same time. Okay, fine I had my kids and with many ruff times it made me a stronger person. I love them, we are all in good health, and I don't wish them away. That's not the point I'm getting at. You are so young, and so full of love and energy, you can do so much with your life, there is plenty of time to think about children. Here is my advice to you, and this is my advice that I would give my own daughter: You are only 15 years old, think of your life as a journey. You only have one life (journey). Set some goals in the next two years. Understand that growing up, means learning self-control and understand that just because you want something so bad, doesn't mean that it's always the right thing to do. Your boyfriend is very young, you can't predict the future. The baby you want to love so much, needs the best that you can give so beleive in yourself. Find your happiness, find yourself first. Grow up before you try and raise a baby. If you wait, I promise you, this won't be a regret. You can always do it. Buy a dog or a pet, and take care of him as if he was yours and your boyfriends. It's not as easy as it seems. Enjoy your life and enjoy your freedom, all those things get taken away when you have a baby. When you wait for something you want for so long, you learn to appreciate it, and things will work out for you. If you feel like having a baby still after you read this, reply to me, with your thoughts on my advice to you. Please girl - just wait!!!! I would never give a girl your age advice to have children because it's not easy.
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A
female
reader, sugar_sugar +, writes (12 February 2008):
 You are very young. If you really love children then you should want to do the very best for a child you have. It would be selfish to have one now just because you love kids when you're not equipped to handle it financially.
Finish school, study hard get a great job that will allow you to financially support a child.
Also LIVE a little. The more of life you experience, the more you will be able to teach your child.
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A
female
reader, amber2328 +, writes (12 February 2008):
 What you want at fifteen will be a thing of the past at sixteen, seventeen, eightteen... I'm sure you see where I am going with this. I had a child at nineteen and I stayed with her father for six yrs mind you six yrs that I should of been in college, going to parties, just being young but I had a child instead! Now her father and I are not together and I am raising a child on my own and I have to work twice as hard and be a mother and a father. I am not saying that you will end up this way but just know that it is not easy and some days suck!!! I love my daughter and she is my world but when you have a child it is no longer about you or what you want to do it's about baby. You seem like a smart girl asking for advice I hope you decide to wait.
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A
female
reader, Ileana +, writes (4 February 2008):
 Hey Hunny,
Im 16 and i have a 8 month old baby boy and im 4 months pregnant. Its hard work! My reasons where my contraception failing yes both times. Me and my boyfriend work full time and have a little flat but its still difficult. Having a baby is hard work and my motivation has so increased now as i want to give my children the best life i can. My boyfriend is a great father and he spends all his time either working or playing with our baby.
Hope i helped.
Ileyana
Just message me if you wanna chat =)
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A
female
reader, happyholly +, writes (31 January 2008):
You know you are to young so you will also not want to hear this. I think you do sound very mature but mature does not pay the bills or feed the children you want. As you are so good with children why not try working with them as a job when you leave school. Train and then work, save then re think about the children. What i do know is children learn alot from their parents they look up 2 them and respect them. when you have children and they look up at you saying mummy what job do/did u have and you say i am a childminder/teacher they will be so proud of you. Thats not to say they are not proud of parents that dont work but it gives them a goal to aim for and the fact we all need to earn money. Raising your children without money is hard and frustrating at times. As you seem a good person and would be a good mum i know you would like to give your children a nice house and things they need and would like. Work hard and live a little and then have your children.
LOVE HOLLY XXXX
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A
female
reader, xXxSTARxXx +, writes (27 January 2008):
Heya, ur not the only girl that thinks of havin children at a young age. But to be realistic it is much harder to raise your own child then look after others. The baby relies on some1 24-7. Not only that but ur boyfriend doesnt seem to keen on the idea, wil he be able to provide for the child (im guessin it wil prob b his).
I know it will be fun to have your own baby to look after, but it would be stressful emotionally and physically. Wouldnt you like to live ur life to the fullest, have fun, be irresponsible at times and not care that a small life is waiting for you to look after them.
Think about it some more and try to talk to teenagers ur age that have children and ask their opinion.
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A
female
reader, red1982 +, writes (25 January 2008):
Things are very different when they are your own children. It's so much harder knowing that they rely on you for every little thing. Especially if you end up on your own with no money and no way of providing enough for basics food, clothes etc let alone trips out to the cinema, swimming or the new trainers they want (believe me when I say they get to that stage quick!!)
I was a teenage mother - and I dont in any way think I did a bad job - but I know that my life would have been a lot easier if I had have had money, a place of my own to live (I was in a homeless hostel with my son for nearly a year) and a boyfriend who hadn't scarpered as soon as he was born. He really wanted children as well - couldn't wait for him to be born but then decided once our son was here that he didn't want it at all, we haven't seen him since he left.
Before I was pregnant I used to look after other peoples kids all the time and thought I knew it all and would be fantastic, until the sleepless nights (and I mean he only slept for one hour out of 6 and spent the rest either feeding or crying), lonliness and stress from having no nappies and not knowing where the money would come from to buy more kicked in. I really struggled for a while.
I understand the strong maternal instinct you have. It's a really hard instinct to ignore. Could you use that maternal instinct in a positive way and maybe take up childcare or a nannying job when you leave school.
I am now married and have a second child - and having a house, two wages and a husband to help with the housework and childcare has made this time around so much nicer for me.
My advice to you is to keep on looking after others children and enjoying it but please wait until you are older (at the very least finished school)and in a settled steady relationship with a man that wants children as much as you do before bringing another life into yours.
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A
female
reader, massageismylife +, writes (23 January 2008):
 Hey honey i know what you are feeling! when i was your age i was wanting the same thing, but just listen to me! when youre at school or working to make money for you and your baby who will watch your baby? and what happens when eventually you wanna go and hang out with some friend but you cant cause your child is sick or something? there are just a few things you have to look at before you decide on things like this!! i personally think you should wait your only 15 and have your whole life ahead of you!! hope this helped you a little good luck hun!!!!
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