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female
,
anonymous
writes: Am I overreacting? One time I was at a bar with my now exboyfriend and I saw him clearly look at a girl's ass right in front of me. I got mad, and then he denied it! He said his head must have been turned in that direction, but I looked at his eyes, and saw exactly where they were looking (I've been known to go out with guys that look at other girls sexually in front of me). He blew up at me, and we left the bar not saying a word, and he drove straight to the liquor store saying that just b/c he is with me, doesn't mean he is going to ignore the rest of the world. I told him I would try to not be so senstitive. Then, a few months later, we were at a bar and once again I saw that he clearly was looking at girl's ass right in front of me. I ignored it, but felt a little upset. Then he started getting mad that I wasn't showing any affection, (which I hadn't the whole nite anyways b/c I was paying attention to the band). As we were leaving I walked a little behind him (not on purpose) and he turned around and I guess tried to reach for my hand but I didn't know, and since I was "too" far behind him he got mad and said that I was asking for other guys to hit on me b/c I wasn't acting like I was with him. In the car I finally told him how I was upset that he looked at the girl's ass, and he broke up with me. Am I crazy to want a guy that just has eyes on me when we go out, and is satisfied with what he has? I don't get it, because he was always saying that I was so much better looking than him, and that everyone was looking at us when we went out, but I never saw it.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 April 2006): There are two things which are important to me: "loyalty" and "respect". I never look at other women. Even when my girlfriend isn't around. That's how much I love her. Those are just my ideals though and I hope that others share them.
A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (20 April 2006):
 Well he needs some dark glasses or mirror shades then lol
lighten up
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2006): Sorry but I dont agree that this is normal behaviour. It is downright rude and shows a complete lack of resepct for you or the women he leers at....
How dare he expect to have the complany of a beautiful woman and then be checking out other.....I would ditch him faster than he could say to himself ...'woah check that out!'
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (19 April 2006):
Sounds more like this relationship wasnt meant to be and you should move on and consign it, and the emotions it makes you feel to the past. Dont let this dozey, abusive idiot poison your mind against all men....they are not all like that you know!!!!
good luck
xxx
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 April 2006): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionyes, I , may have overreacted a little, and he always said he wanted to be with me, and asked "who do I come home to every nite?" But, it just seems like he was taking me for granted (we're not together anymore b/c he sexually assaulted me and was abusive and rude and did drugs). I know for a fact that I see girls with their boyfriends who are all about them when they go out, if anything, I think that he was the insecure one, thinking I would leave him in an instant.
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (19 April 2006):
I do think you are over-reacting somewhat on this issue. Short of blindfolding him you are never going to be able to stop him looking.....it is what humans do. It is natural. It does not mean he is going to run off with somebody else, he is just looking!!
You see what will probably happen now is that you will make him so paranoid he will start to not want to go out with you because you are likely to kick off on him should his eyes *stray*!
Then because he doesnt want to go to bars with you (anything for an easy life) you will read into this as an agenda that he wants to go out without you in order to *get up to something*. Then you will clamp down on him harder, causing him to kick back!!
You see, self-fulfilling prophecy!!
So work on you insecurity and self-esteem issues. He is with you for a reason - because he wants to be with you and nobody else. Dont make a drama, just accept this is normal male or female behaviour.
Good luck
xxx
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