| Latest articles: Are you in a controlling relationship?
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
3 April 2009: i decided to write this article in view of the amount of people that I know/know of who are in unuqual relationships, that is in particular women who are in unequal relationships. Im not sating that it doesnt happen to men, of course, but often it ...
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The man I'm dating wants to borrow 20,000.00. How do I tell him no nicely?
Q. Hello, The man with whom I'm in love has been offered a contract worth $ 270 000. He is so thrilled about this new opportunity. However, to be able to execute the contract, he has to show proof that he has $50 000 in his bank account. He only hav...
A. 3 November 2012: you're kidding me right?! why would you need to show proof of any money to execute a contract, seriously you are being scammed. get out of there, fast. and RUN... (read in full...)
Hubby won't get healthy for his own sake!
Q. My husband used to be in very great shape (he was in the military.) But for the past several years, he's pretty much doubled his size (he's now 350 lbs.) He was working full-time until a couple of months ago, but now all he does is sleep all day - ...
A. 27 October 2012: it sounds as though he could be depressed and his increase in his weight is making this worse. I know you are probably a healthy weight but the best way around this is to suggest you get fit together and exercise together. that way you are not ... (read in full...)
I'm embarassed about how I look - should I cancel my date?
Q. Hello Everyone, I met a guy online a week ago, and we hit it off really well, and have now started speaking via mobile phone, he seems nice and there seems to be a positive connection. We've scheduled to meet each other for the first time next Sa...
A. 26 October 2012: Im sorry to read about him not getting back to you, like you said he could at least have been honest, and not messed you about. that would really piss me off too. ... (read in full...)
I'm jealous that his 16 year old daughter is pregnant!
Q. Ok I know this is going to generate negative responses but here goes. My longtime baby daddy just informed me that his 16 yr old is 5 months pregnant. One, I can't shake off that he waited 5 months to tell me and second, I can't help but to feel ...
A. 26 October 2012: I dont think you sound selfish or anything like it. I think you are (very rightly so) upset that he has not committed properly to you. I would discuss this frankly with him. good luck... (read in full...)
I've started taking the pill but the doctor gave no advice at all!
Q. so i went to my doctor and got the pill but she was no help at all with what to do. So i had to research and ask my friends, basically I started my period this monday, but i started taking the pill today. My friends said this is fine, because ...
A. 26 October 2012: you can move the time forwards or backwards a few hours to suit your schedule, it wont affect your protection... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is upset our porn movie has been posted online.
Q. My girlfriend is a sweet, amazing girl but very shy 21 year old. She was in a few very bad relationships before we met and has some trust issues from being hurt in the past. I had always wanted to make a sex tape but never did because ...
A. 22 October 2012: you need to grow a pair, no offense. seriously, call the police and get your room mate reported. he is sick, to do such a thing to anyone let alone people he actually knows. to share a room with someone requires a certain amount of trust and he ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got his roommate pregnant with twins. We have a child together. What should I do?
Q. Please help me I just found out about my boyfriend, who lives in another house, got his roommate pregnant 7 months ago. She now had twins but she's not out of the hospital yet. I found out about it today I have never liked her. the first time I...
A. 19 October 2012: I meant to say that I dont believe HIS story for 1 second. sorry if that came out wrong. you need to get rid of him, he is a total loser. bad enough cheating on you but to totally disregards your sexual health... unforgiveable... (read in full...)
My girlfriend is upset our porn movie has been posted online.
Q. My girlfriend is a sweet, amazing girl but very shy 21 year old. She was in a few very bad relationships before we met and has some trust issues from being hurt in the past. I had always wanted to make a sex tape but never did because ...
A. 15 October 2012: I agree with the other poster, you need to call the police in on this one. that is serious and the fact that your room mate admitted to doing it... well lets just say I would show him I was serious... (read in full...)
Should I confront my ex's finance over her actions whenever my ex visits his son? Is she jealous or insecure?
Q. Hello cupids! Some help here would be appreciated. I have an 8 week old son with my ex. I left him when i was 3 months pregnant because he cheated, and i was confronted by the "other woman". At the time he had been with her we were not serious...
A. 15 October 2012: it takes two to tango.
he is more to blame than her, he is a grown man. you two should not have had a baby in such ''casual'' circumstances... (read in full...)
How do I get through this? I'm a young Mom. BoyF left me. Despite medical assistance this situation is affecting my everyday routines.
Q. Hi fellow Cupids, Bit of an issue on my hands. Recently (The past month or so) I have been feeling depressed like you wouldnt believe. Im currently on medication to no avail, so I'm attempting a different route and hoping you guys could offer ...
A. 15 October 2012: he needs to get off his backside, get a job and support his child. its not the taxpayers job to be filling in for him.... (read in full...)
I'm embarassed about how I look - should I cancel my date?
Q. Hello Everyone, I met a guy online a week ago, and we hit it off really well, and have now started speaking via mobile phone, he seems nice and there seems to be a positive connection. We've scheduled to meet each other for the first time next Sa...
A. 15 October 2012: I forgot to say wear something you feel comfortable in... (read in full...)
I'm embarassed about how I look - should I cancel my date?
Q. Hello Everyone, I met a guy online a week ago, and we hit it off really well, and have now started speaking via mobile phone, he seems nice and there seems to be a positive connection. We've scheduled to meet each other for the first time next Sa...
A. 15 October 2012: this guy sounds more mature and less shallow than the previous idiot, so I say go for it and try to forget about your weight while you are with him. it sounds as though you might be making a bigger deal of your weight than is necessary, writing on ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend got his roommate pregnant with twins. We have a child together. What should I do?
Q. Please help me I just found out about my boyfriend, who lives in another house, got his roommate pregnant 7 months ago. She now had twins but she's not out of the hospital yet. I found out about it today I have never liked her. the first time I...
A. 12 October 2012: I dont believe this story for 1 second.
you say she had twins, generally when someone is pregnant with twins they will show way sooner than if they are having one baby, AND she would have told him sooner seeing as they were living together... (read in full...)
How do I explain my severe PMS/PMDD to the guy I'm dating?
Q. I've been dating this amazing guy since the end of July. Things have been great and each time we see each other, things for the most part just keep getting better and better. 2 times during our short lived relationship (1 each month), I have t...
A. 8 October 2012: I also get this although I think it is just severe PMS in my case and not PMDD as the intensity of my symptoms varies. I am on the pill and I can honestly say it helps A LOT in terms of length of time of symptoms, although my symptoms havent d... (read in full...)
Should I take a risk and move to Sweden??
Q. I'm thinking about moving to Sweden for a couple of years to live or study...it's something that's been in my mind for about three years now. Even though i don't NEED to study further because i'm 26 and already have two degrees, i would just lik...
A. 6 October 2012: I have been to Sweden twice and I can assure you that it is a pleasant and orderly place. almost everyone speaks English and you cant get lost in Stockholm. just make sure you have a plan in mind good luck... (read in full...)
How can this be resolved? I have a feeling that my Bf does not want to tell his family that he has a daughter almost 3 years old.
Q. Hi, I'm 18, and I have a daughter who turns 3 in December Basically, I fell pregnant and I didn't find out until i was 14 weeks pregnant, I'm still with the childs father but here's the tricky part, 2 weeks before I found out I was pregnant, my...
A. 3 October 2012: the answer is obvious, TELL THEM?!!! why would you go along with this for so long? your child is missng out on half its family because of his selfishness but also because of you being too willing to go along with this ridiculous idea. he sounds like ... (read in full...)
Could he care about our baby? Or is he just using me when he needs something?
Q. Hello My name is Sexy C, I need some help I have been with this guy for about 17 years off and on. When he goes to jail im there for him when he comes home I might see him but he will go be other places and then when he needs something Im the...
A. 3 October 2012: you have been with him 17 years, he has a live in girlfriend and kids with other people, he is a regular inmate at the county jail... need I say more? he sounds like trailer trash, to be honest. get whatever help you need/can find in getting over ... (read in full...)
How do I get over my backstabbing boyfriend who cheated on me with my cousin?
Q. My question is, how do I get over the fact that my heart belongs to a lying, cheating, sneaky, manipulator bastard who had sexual intercourses with my younger cousin who is now 21 and pregnant by him supposely? I been knowing this guy for 2yrs now ...
A. 28 September 2012: that truly is awful, you dont say if you have kids with him but I will assume you dont, if you dont then you are one lucky woman although you probably dont feel lucky in any way right now. I am sorry for anyone who has to go through betrayal, but ... (read in full...)
I feel emotional and grieving over losing a child that was goin to terminate is this normal?
Q. Hi guys just looking for support or advice Found out i was pregnant 2 weeks ago after a routine blood test at the doctors it came as an absolute shock as me and my boyfriend were on a rocky road and the fact i had thought i got my period a week be...
A. 10 September 2012: yes this is quite common and I have heard of it happening. you feel emotional and grieving because although you didnt know about being pregnant your body did know and it was already preparing itself for the (almost) 9 months ahead. you are also ... (read in full...)
Ex said baby wasn't mine, but it resembles me and I feel guilty
Q. My ex n i broke up when she was 2 mnths pgnt.She later said that its cz pregnancy wsnt mine. We lost contact, she gave birth, baby is 5mnths. Have only seen baby's pics, we resemble. I feel guilty all the time, i cant move on, I dont know what ...
A. 10 September 2012: you need to get a paternity test done to see if you really are the father. ask your doctor about such a test, they will need to take swabs of DNA from inside you and the babys mouth. and the test should be done in front of you too. good luck... (read in full...)
How do I break this to her without her thinking it's about her?
Q. I've been in a relationship with a 17 year old for about a month and a half. Its long distance so we only see eachother once a week and for me, its a 5 hour round trip. She is in a big exam year so I feel guilty asking her to come to mine, but the ...
A. 10 September 2012: I think if you are not sure about the relationship ending then maybe you should come to an arrangement where you take it in turns to visit the other person. if she needs to take the train or bus to yours you could check online to see if you (or her ... (read in full...)
No to a tubal ligation. But I never want to be pregnant. Terrified of it. What can I do?
Q. I’m a woman aged 28 years old and I’ve very big trouble. I’m dreadfully afraid of pregnancy and it affects my sex life more and more. I’ve a boyfriend, we’re together for two years, but sex has always been a stress for me. I want him and I want s...
A. 5 September 2012: if for whatever reason you wont get your tubes tied and I agree you should, at least use a diaphragm with a condom.... that would reduce the chances of pregnancy to nil.... (read in full...)
I'm 14 and I'm pregnant by my 15 year old B/f who talked me into sex. What do I do now?
Q. Hey!:) Ok, I have a huge problem and really need some help! I'm 14 years old, and have been in a relationship with my boyfriend for 4 months. He is 15, and in the year above me at school. At the beginning of the relationship, everything was absoutol...
A. 5 September 2012: hi I have just read your question and answers to it. you might be much better off with an abortion at your age. you dont want to be a single mum and also with you being in care and under 16 the baby could be taken off u -not trying to worry yo... (read in full...)
B/f cheated, got her pregnant but says he loves me more. What do I do?
Q. my boyfriend of 3years cheated on me for 3monthes with a girl much younger than me and even got her pregnant. i found out recently from the girl her self. i asked him but at first he was denying later on he told me the truth but he says he loves me ...
A. 5 September 2012: I forgot to say in my last answer that you deserve much better.... (read in full...)
B/f cheated, got her pregnant but says he loves me more. What do I do?
Q. my boyfriend of 3years cheated on me for 3monthes with a girl much younger than me and even got her pregnant. i found out recently from the girl her self. i asked him but at first he was denying later on he told me the truth but he says he loves me ...
A. 5 September 2012: that is terrible, Im very sorry for anyone who finds themselves in your situation. although your heart is probably telling you to stay, it will be better if you leave him and stay away. this is his mess, not yours. it is bad enough that he cheated ... (read in full...)
I feel like my love for him died.
Q. I had a pregnancy scare a few days ago, I told my bf and I took a test, it came out positive. But, just to be sure I made an appointment for another test. At first, my bf seemed supportive and soothed my nerves. On our way to the appointment though, ...
A. 4 September 2012: I think you are not overreacting AT ALL! What a horrible way to treat you when you were obviously stressed out and upset aswell as a load of other emotions. Also you say the first test was positive... you dont normally get false positives with p... (read in full...)
Is it fair of him to ask me to find another home for my cat??
Q. My boyfriend and I have been together 8 months, I'm 25 he's 27. Things have moved pretty quickly, but we are very happy and talk about the future openingly, and we are definitely in love. We currently live separately, but have talking about getting ...
A. 29 August 2012: hello, Im 23 and have been going out with my boyfriend for 8 months also, and like you I own a long haired indoor cat. if for the same reason my boyfriend asked me to get rid of the cat, or any other reason I would say no. personally I would have a ... (read in full...)
Are there any real benefits to casual sex?
Q. My first sexual experience was a FWB. I was 13, she was much older and, to my recollection, it was a very awkward, uncomfortable situation. It bothered me a lot and perhaps has made me biased against them. When I go back through my memory, the ...
A. 29 August 2012: in answer to the title of your question -no.... (read in full...)
Tattoos of each other's names. Now we've split up, should I get mine covered?
Q. Me and my boyfriend have recently split up we both have tattoos of each others names I booked to have mine covered over but they can't do it til after Christmas my ex is having a tattoo done Christmas time when I asked him is he having my tattoo ...
A. 29 August 2012: never mind what he says, he will surely get it lasered off or covered soon enough. this is about YOU now, not him. I would definitely get rid of it, and make sure to never make this mistake again as getting tattoos of peoples names is a BIG mistake ... (read in full...)
He's married with 2 children. But WAS very keen on me, but now he's avoiding me. Should I tell the new guy about my (almost) relationship with Manager?
Q. Hi, I met a guy (manager) of different dept. a few months ago. We became good friends. I told him about some tragedies that happened in my life. He was sympathetic and I started having feelings for him. He is married and has 2 sons. I guess he fel...
A. 27 August 2012: DONT tell the new guy, if you broke up or didnt get on etc he could spread rumours about you and make this a whole lot worse. you dont want the first guys wife on your case or everyone (wrongly) labelling you as a tart when you didnt even have sex ... (read in full...)
How do I avoid becoming pregnant by my husband who won't allow me to use birth control?
Q. My husband of 6 years won't pull out during sex. We are catholic so he refuses for me to use any birth control. I do not want to get pregnant. Please give me advice...
A. 27 August 2012: anonymous123 has got it in one. also I find it abusive that he wont allow you use contraception, that is a crazy mindset to have in this day and age... (read in full...)
How do I avoid becoming pregnant by my husband who won't allow me to use birth control?
Q. My husband of 6 years won't pull out during sex. We are catholic so he refuses for me to use any birth control. I do not want to get pregnant. Please give me advice...
A. 26 August 2012: get the implant in your arm and that way he wont know. he has no right to interfere in you using or not using contraception, regardless of his beliefs... (read in full...)
Counseling is helping and I don't know where to turn.
Q. There is no easy way to get into this so I will get steaight to the point. I have always had a disfunctional family. (Dad beat my mom etc every day she was always in hospital he was an alcholic just a bit of background on that) the thing is I was ...
A. 25 August 2012: I have just read your update and you are planning the right things. It is one thing being there for people but when your own life is being ruined by them then you have to make the right choice for you. you are making a success of your life by making ... (read in full...)
Indian society is very harsh on babies born out of wedlock but the man wants nothing to do with me. What do I do now?
Q. Dear Cupid I am basically Indian, working in US. Had an affair with a guy, I was in love with him, obviously he just used me for sex and money. Now I am pregnant, he didn't use condom, since Indian guys hate condom. They never use one, I took morn...
A. 25 August 2012: in the USA they have counselling for all kinds of things, even pregnancy counselling. some charities or even Planned Parenthood offer it. they should be helpful and they will not judge you, they see people in the same situation all of the time and ... (read in full...)
My boyfriend is selfish and refuses to change
Q. I met my boyfriend almost 7 months ago - the relationship moved super fast - and he loved me right away, in fact, he told me he loved me after 4 days, we moved in 2 months in. But everything is seemingly going downhill now. He used to be so caring, ...
A. 25 August 2012: I would adivse you to start distancing yourself from him mentally and if you have a friend/family member who wont mind you moving your stuff slowly to their house just until you get your own place, do just that for your own sake. I also was going ... (read in full...)
How can I block my ex? She keeps texting me!
Q. plz anyone have advice 4 me i would be greatful. my ex girlfriend keeps texting me, some nice texts and some nasty. i dont reply to any of them at all and delete them. when will she give up we split a month ago. she sends about 3 or 4 a day and some ...
A. 25 August 2012: some phones have a setting where you can block texts/calls from certain numbers yourself. the last 2 phones Ive had were samsungs, they were not high range phones at 60-80 euros and I was able to block messages and calls from nuisance people. that ... (read in full...)
Counseling is helping and I don't know where to turn.
Q. There is no easy way to get into this so I will get steaight to the point. I have always had a disfunctional family. (Dad beat my mom etc every day she was always in hospital he was an alcholic just a bit of background on that) the thing is I was ...
A. 23 August 2012: I am very sorry for what you have gone through. I think you should confide in your counsellor, they are trained to listen and calmly provide people with guidance and not to be shocked. as a counsellor they well may have heard previous clients ... (read in full...)
Have any other women used Cerazette before?
Q. I've just been put on the pill, cerazette. Thing is, I went round my friends last night and all of them said how they would avoid that pill because of the side effects and you experience really bad depression and gain so much weight and all these ...
A. 22 August 2012: I have heard from other people who used cerazette that it is good, I think it is a pill you take continuously, if its the one Im thinking of then it is supposed to stop you having periods which is brilliant for people who have trouble with theirs ... (read in full...)
I wet his bed while I was drunk, and don't know if I should tell him about it.
Q. I've been seeing this guy and we've been sleeping together. After a drunken night, I woke up and realized I had peed in his bed. I was embarrassed and didn't want to say anything so I just covered it up with the comforter and am hoping it will dry ...
A. 19 August 2012: dont bother telling him, but if it ever happens again try and get a quiet moment so you can spill some water over it then say you spilled your glass of water... (read in full...)
What makes big boobs more valuable?
Q. I have small breasts nd I hate them. I mean, they're healthy, and that's cool, but despite my feminine body still at 23 people say I look like a 10 year old boy. I don't. I have a defined waist, wide hips, a curvy butt, thick legs... I've never seen ...
A. 19 August 2012: I dont know why men are like this but I used to get the same comments too, maybe you should try giving them a personal remark in return for what they say to you. it sounds as though you look good already from your description... (read in full...)
Why does he need a pin on his iPhone and why is it such a secret? What are your thoughts?
Q. Hi im just wondering what everybodys view are on their Partners phones? my bf and I have had a few up and downs over the last two years but recently there has been an issue since he got his iphone. Basically he has a pin block on it, which he say...
A. 16 August 2012: I agree the most with So Very Confused, they have summed it up for me. talk to him about it, Im having the same trouble right now except my boyfriend just has a normal phone. if they had nothing to hide, they would give it to the girlfriend. end of, ... (read in full...)
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