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female
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anonymous
writes: My boyfriend and I have been dating over 4 years and have moved in together about a month ago. I packed up my life, and had everything moved to our place in 3 days. He brought 2 boxes and a gym bag, and returns to his mothers house weekly to get things that he needs. I am extremely hurt and confused by this. Is it unfair for me to ask him to just pack it all up and bring it to our home? It makes me feel that he is just not commited to us. I have tried talking to him about this, but he refuses to budge and claims he doesn't want to clutter our place with junk. I don't consider clothes and shoes junk! What should i do???
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2006): You do absolutely nothing. You've spoken to him about it and he gave you an answer. Dear, I'm trying to figure out why-if he's not moving everything in at once, this is so confusing to you? He's physically there and he's living with you, isn't he? You guys are spending quality time, loving and building a relationship and a life together-it should make no difference how many boxes of stuff he moves in. If he close to his family, perhaps he's had some 'resistance' from Mom and Dad and he's slowly moving stuff-just to allow them to accept the big change. Whatever his reasons are, I'm sure it's not directly aimed at confusing you or hurting so try not to over analyze why he's doing this. Enjoy the fact that he's with you and you two are enjoying a new life of togetherness. Just allow him to take his time, to get things moved in, at his own pace.
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