A
female
age
22-25,
anonymous
writes:Why is it that I push my boyfriend away when he is near me, and then when he goes (we live far apart) I start missing him and loving him more and wishing he was here? Am I just afraid? I've only been in abusive relationships and he is the first nice guy I have dated. Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, xxsecretsxx +, writes (14 July 2008):
 Absence makes the heart grow fonder. You might be pushing him away because you are afraid to get closer to him only to have a drastic low when you leave from your visit. I know from experience that pushing them away doesn't help. Try to be more open, it hurts when you have to leave, but knowing that the time you spend was meaningful, makes it all the better.
A
female
reader, baby duck +, writes (14 July 2008):
 If you've only been in abusive relationships, the lack of drama in a relationship with a nice guy might feel ... boring. Maybe you are creating drama with pushing him away. Good for you that you recognize this.
There is a ton of info on the internet. Research, research, research. Be willing to face your flaws. Journal. Feel your feelings and resist the urge to intellectualize them with labels and justifications. That is the only way to release all the pent up muck from your past.
Best wishes.
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