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female
,
anonymous
writes: I have noticed that when I sleep with my boyfriend I feel all emotional and vulnerable for a few days.We cuddle afterwards which is always good. But when he leaves me I sort of feel really low, during this time, when I may not see him for a couple of days because of work, commitments etc I feel really strange. It's funny, because he's always full on when we're going to get together but once we've had sex he sort of cools off. It's as though I need more attention after we have made love and it's normally during this time that we have our bust ups. Does anyone else feel the same, is it just the way us girls are and why don't men feel as emotional about it? We have been together for a few years now and love each other, I wish I could feel differently, any ideas anyone? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 October 2006): Hmm, it is interesting that this is what you are experiencing after sex when you have been together for a few years...this is how women often feel after sex because you are bonded to your man, and men often feel quite vulnerable after sex and need their space afterwards. This is usually more common in a new relationship, so it makes me think that your boyfriend is not ready to take your relationship to the next level of committment, and quite frankly I think 5 years is long enough to date before he proposes marriage, however, I don't know your ages or what age you were when you began dating or began your relationship...so perhaps you were very young...if you want more of a committment from him, you might tell him what you want and that you need more attention and closeness and togetherness from him, in short a committment...if he is not ready to give it to you, you may want to stop seeing him so often or break up with him for a time period to be specified to give him some time to decide if he wants a stronger committment...sometimes a boyfriend needs to lose you to realize whether or not he wants to seal the deal with you....but I would try to get your feelings accross to him instead of suffering in silence, maybe he doesn't know how you feel.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 October 2006): i felt the same way then i realized that what i want is full commitment and that is being married to him. knowing that he is mine and i'm his. knowing that he'll be home with me everyday. i have fear of losing him. so if you are not ready or if he's not ready to make that commitment you will always feel that way.
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