A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Is it true that when a partner dumps the other one angrily, because of a perceived *albeit* huge mistake,they will regret it later on when they cool off, or at least reflect on their part of the fault too? Has anyone dumped someone they truly loved, but they found they could not manage/deal with ( for several reasons like personality clash, communication mistakes, other complicated life circumstances and pressures , but not for falling out of love?). I am the dumpee, and dealing very hard with his withdrawing everything literally from what I thought it was a blisful trusting relationship, to being ignored and dumped, in an angry fit , in an ugly situation... Just trying to understand.. I know I had my problems inthe past when I hurt/dumped someone not because I didnt have feelings for them,but becasue I knew the relationship was truly impossible, but then after years I went back to them,because the situation changed.. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionrocknroll, thank you for your thoughful answer. I too think there is no place for him to hide atm. I have made my mistakes but his have been really over exposed and knowing him bieng proud by nature, I can consider that perhaps he feels ashamed. I hope it's not just my wishful thinking, because our breakup happened overnight, with me( at my angriest peak ever), making him very very angry towards me. Truth to be said, we have had the same problems over the years only that this time they really exploded on our faces.He hasn't attempted contact but I know he is checking his emails from me; I have been sending a few lines there, reflecting neutrally on what has happened, emphasising on those emails that I don't know if he'll ever read them but this is my way of healing from this trauma. He probably forgot I knew the password too, and he goes daily in to this email addie reserved for just our communication and reads them ( well, at least it looks like it, they go from 'unread' to 'read' and he hasn't deleted one ever.
We shall see, this is a well needed cooling time anyway in which I really am starting to re-assess the whole thing; Thank you again for your answer.
A
male
reader, rocknroll  +, writes (26 May 2009):
I've noticed if I am mad, or a girl is mad, that things are said out of frustration that they were in that moment, and do regret what they did after they have coled down.
I really think because we were not taught relationships skill, skills to tamper our anger and frustration, that we will make many more mistakes until we learn to calm down.
it seems at least some of us realize what fools we were, and that alone wakes us up to not do it again, to be more patient.
I'm sorry for your situation, and hope you don't take it to hard on yourself. There is always a chance he will come around, otherwise, he is to embarrassed because of it.
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