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male
age
30-35,
*oarders73
writes: I've recently got out of a relationship that I was in for two months. The girl said that she wanted to be single and "right now isn't the best time for me to have a bf." I was kinda feeling the same so we broke up. I can't get her out of my head and we recently went out to a party together. Afterwards I told her i still love her and told me the same but that she still isn't ready for a relationship. I want to still get to kno her better and she agreed to go out with me again, i want to buy her a x-mas gift als. Should I continue to see her on a friend basis and buy her the gift? please help
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female
reader, Nella +, writes (18 December 2006):
I think it's worth hanging on in there, as it sounds like she's still attracted to you and did agree to go out with you again - it's just the timing that's wrong. I'm wondering if she's been hurt by a boyfriend before she got together with you? Or what her other explanations are for wanting to be single right now? It sounds really important that you take it really slowly and don't scare her off. Soem casual dating may be the way forward, but don't hold out lots of hope in case you get disappointed and it doesn't work out. A small Xmas gift may be a good idea but don't go over the top! Just relax, see each other as mates, don't put any pressure on her or yourself, see how it goes over time and keep taking to each other about how you both feel. If it becomes obvious over time that she really isn't interested in anything more than friendship, then move on and find someone else as a girlfriend, at least you will know you still have a good mate in your ex.
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