A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Let me explain a situation. I attended a party recently of a group of ladies I belong to. They are all nice people. But they are SOOOO WILD!!! They are all big drinkers. Almost all of their events involve drinking. They cuss and talk dirty. They are not any of them in the group that I do not like. But I do not cuss much at all and I drink a little socially. Even though they are nice, they make little snide remarks. They are aware that this is not really my cup of tea. Sometimes if they cuss, they quickly cover it up or apologize. This kind of hurts my feelings. I would like to attend some of their events without feeling like I have to be as wild as they are. I want them to accept me the way that I am and not make snide remarks.Does anyone understand? Does anyone have any advice or insight into this matter? How can I continue to be a member and continue to attend some of the events without being a cusser or a dirty talker and at the same time still get along with the group and make friends?Another thought is that there is another really nice person in the group, and I do not hear her cuss and talk dirty at all. No one gives her a hard time about it. Why is this? Any hints or tips would be appreciated.Sincerely,Distraught in Detroit Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ima FreAk!  +, writes (26 June 2011):
 Hiyaaaaa,
Honestly I have a similar problem with you... basically I do voluntary work at one my primary school (kindergarden I think it's for Americans not sure) but its a school from 5-11. And recently I met her again and we were really happy and she kinda changed, she smokes, drinks, VERY WILD she likes screams half way across the street and I'm like are you mad?
She is a very nice girl but not a girl I would like to get influenced.
So what I do is if I see her say hello and you have a small talk and then go away kinda thing because even though she is nice she isn't the kinda person that would support me and she blackmailed me once because I had my exams and she was like ohhh your not my friend or my best friend and you would choose your exams over me? And I'm like DUHHHH loooooooool
Honestly if you feel that they are too much just go home and honestly who gives a f**k! It's your life honey and if you feel uncomfortable anytime you can leave its your wish. Yh it might not be your cuppa but if you would stay with them then you might be influenced and if anything goes wrong they could blame you and don't wanna take their crap basically.
Just limit yourself and you can always make new groupies or even confront them if they really give you a hard time and leave. It doesn't matter because you don't wanna lose your dignity or pride!
Hope my advice helps!
Good luck!
Lots of love,
Ima FreAk!
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