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She's a terrible travel partner, how can I avoid spending time with her?

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Question - (23 May 2012) 2 Answers - (Newest, 23 May 2012)
A female Norway age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Last year I went on vacation with one of my best friends. It was a nightmare. I already knew she can be a bit self centered and runs on an ego-trip. I don't know why I thought going away would her could ever be a good idea.

I bit my tongue during the vacation. And she is still blissfully unaware of how fed up with her I got. It took me months of avoiding her after we got back before I could stand hanging out with her again. I just had no patience left for her, so I lied to her and told her I was too busy. I feel bad for lying.

Things are getting better now I think, as I am putting it behind me. But last time we spoke she started talking about the two of us going on vacation together again! Se thinks I am the perfect travel-partner, ironically.

Do I spill the beans and tell her how it is? That I don't want to travel with her again? The vacation she's thinking about will last for up to a month, not just a week! Or do I casually ignore it, and don't give her a specific reason for why I wont go with her?

Some of the things she did:

-complaining when I wanted to eat because she wasn't hungry yet (which means she'd start complaining about how she had to wait for me, and how slow I eat, and then several times just leaving me alone while she walked off)

-walking ahead of me all the time, because I was "too slow" for her

-borrowing clothes out of my suitcase without asking permission. Several times. I was not allowed to borrow any of her clothes

-complaining whenever I wanted to do something she didn't want to. Either she got her way, or she spent the time complaining about it.

-having me take pictures of her all the time, but sulking when I ask her to take pictures of me (with heavy sighs)

-getting on my back about when I got up in the morning

And that's just some of it.

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (23 May 2012):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntYou needn't "spill the beans" to her. Just, simply, be unavailable for the time(s) (whenever it is) that she wants to travel with you.....

What's to be gained by telling her off?????

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A female reader, jinxx Canada +, writes (23 May 2012):

jinxx agony auntTell her the truth about why you're no longer interested in traveling with her. If she knows how you feel, that gives her the opportunity to become less impatient and more pleasant to be around.

That being said, I wouldn't travel with her again unless you see that she has changed. Not worth the risk, especially not for an entire month!

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