A
female
age
30-35,
*2121
writes:hello i just found out my mom took an overdose and if it wasn't for my little sister finding her she would have died. i think it was totally selfish of her as she has me my 15 yr old sister and 1 year old son. she says it because of all the stress with her mom recently dieing and then finding out her close brother was dieing of cancer. i can understand all that but then she turned round and screamed at me it was my fault, i was hurting b4 that but that comment just cut me up. im not a bad daughter the most she screams at me 4 is not tidying up but i didnt care how she can try and kill her self over me not cleaning up . i lashed out at her by throwing a drink over her and threw a few chairs i feel bad but i havent brought myself to talk to her but i no she needs my help. any advice how 2 handle the situation? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (3 November 2007):
 I want you to know this. It's not your fault. Repeat it to yourself often.
She's stressed. She's lashing out at you because of the stress. I'm sure you've seen people freak out over little things, and make the little things BIG issues. Normally when they do that, what they lash out about is not the issue at all.
Your mom need help. She needs counseling in handling her grief. The best you can do for her is be there for her. When she's upset, hold her. Don't look at the OD as something selfish against you. Remember it has nothing to do with you, it has to do with the overwhelming feeling the person who OD's has. Too many things happening at once, and thinking death is the only way to solve it.
I'd get her some psychological help. I would even discuss this with maybe a school counselor and see if they can recommend someone who she can speak to. This is very difficult, and all though your having a hard time. Your mom trying to end her life, I would hate to see what's going through her mind to cause her to go that direction.
From what I understand when this happens. Take the trauma from rape or sexual assault and multiply that trauma by 100. That's what's going on with your mom. Instead of looking down at her, support her. I know what she said was real hurtful. People know trying to kill themselves is wrong, so in order to eliminate that additional guilt to the pain they all ready have, it's easier to blame the cause on others.
Take care. Keep your chin up, and always remember you're an important person, no matter what anyone says or does, you're still important, because you're you.
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