A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I don't know what to do really about this anymore so I thought I'd ask for help. I just don't like sex. My boyfriend is attentive and very good at what he does, but I just don;t ever feel like it. Well I do and I initiate it but then I just lie there waiting for it to be over. I've always had problems with hormonal contraception and he's right, I do blame that for my lack of interest...even though deep down I know I just don't want to do it. And its not just him, I've never been intereseted it ever. He's the longest boyfriend I have and understandably its getting to him. He'll never leave me but I don't want him to be miserable because I can't even feign interest properly....what do I do to help both of us?
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female
reader, Nime  +, writes (28 October 2010):
 Look up how hormonal contraception increases your levels of something called SHBG (sex-hormone binding globulin). SHGB both interferes with production of free testosterone and also binds with available free testosterone, making it unusable in the woman's body. Free testosterone plays a major role in female sexual health. Studies have shown that women on hormonal contraception have much higher levels of SHBG than women who are not on hormonal contraception. They've also shown that women with an increased level of SHBG (and corresponding low free testosterone) have decreased arousal potential, decreased ability to become aroused during sex, decreased sexual thoughts, difficulty with self-lubricating (vaginal wetness), sexual dysfunction and so forth. In essence, the sex drive flat-lines. What's scary about this is that women who stopped using hormonal contraception continued to have abnormally high levels of SHBG one year later, which suggests the effects may be permanent.
Hormonal contraception affects everyone differently, but if you're experiencing no sex drive at 22 then I would look at your contraception first. You should look this research up yourself and show your boyfriend, then get yourself off the pill and on a non-hormonal copper IUD.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 October 2010): I think you need to talk to some professional. May be just may be you arent into men, which is o.k. too. Or may be its the pills you take. But you need to figure this out. Sex is exciting and can be very enjoyable. Hopefully it can change for u
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