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I will give anything just to be in love even for one day..

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Question - (10 October 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 October 2009)
A male United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

I am almost 22 years old and I have never been kissed or had sex. Most people are excited about turning 21 but it was one of the worst days of my life because I knew it was one step closer to being a 40 year old virgin.. I have never been in a relationship and I have been on a single date my entire life.(She was not interested.) This summer a girl asked me. she was very pretty and seemed like a very nice person but on the day we were supposed to go on our first date there was an inland tornado/hurricane and I have not heard from her since..I called, i emailed but got nothing back.. This is the 7th week of the semester and I have asked 10 girls out and they all said no and I dont know why. I am a good looking guy,neat, well dressed clean shaven 180lbs and atlethically built...Why Me???

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2009):

Is your frustration only becoz you want something which is not happening or becoz you are comparing yourself with others and feeling peer pressure kind of thing? I am asking this becoz I am a 33 year old virgin guy.. never kissed a girl and was never loved by a girl. We sound very similar.. except I am a decade older than you lol. Dont mistake me.. I want love and sex as much as you or any other guy. But I dont feel terrible. I am happy with other pleasures I have got in my life. I think the difference between us is becoz of the peer pressure. In my place being virgin at 30 is not very uncommon. If it is mainly becoz of peer pressure you can really beat it. Now I am not saying that you should stop seeking love and be content with it. I havent stopped seeking love. But you dont need to feel frustrated. Be cheerful. You say you are good looking and well built. I am the opposite of you lol. If I can be confident, you can be much more confident. The problem is not you. You just havent met the right person. Next year this time, you may be complaining that too many girls are after you and you cant handle it ;) Good luck!

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2009):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

it makes a lot of sense...Thanks

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A reader, anonymous, writes (11 October 2009):

The most important thing is to not give up. Keep trying!

With that being said, girls can immediately detect a desperate dude.

So when you are asking your next girl out, be wary of doing a direct "Would you like to go out to _____" and instead try to chat them up a bit, get her number eventually (you see them in classes right?) call her a few times, meet with her someplace, then ask her to do something. Never say "go out" or "date."

For some reason I have found success with this method rather than going directly for the "Lets go see a ____ sometime!" method because they feel that they are not under any pressure, and that it's not really a date. I know it's silly but it works.

It took me a long time to find this out. I didn't get my first kiss until I was 19, and no sex until 20. So be chill man, it'll work out :-D

Also when a girl likes you, she will usually be PAINFULLY obvious about it. She will say your name often, she will ask you what you have been doing, she will respond favorably in conversation, etc etc. So if she is being extremely standoffish all the time, you shouldn't even continue pursuing her and move on.

Don't wait for them to ask you out though, even if she is interested, you gotta take the first step.

I hope this helps man because I was feeling exactly the same way you do right now just a few years ago.

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A female reader, 1LonelyNConfusedGirl United States +, writes (11 October 2009):

Hello. I'm 19 and I have never been in a relationship either. I would like to date this guy but my parents don't want me dating any guys. But thats different from your situation. You should just have patience and stop trying to be in a relationship too fast. It'll happen at the right time with the right girl if you give it time. Your still young and have plenty of time to find someone just for you. It probably has nothing to do with you anyways.

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