A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a weird situation at the moment and I'd really appreciate some advice on what I should do!I'll try to go through this in a logical order. Here goes...I think one or both of my parents have started smoking. I think this because:1) I found an unused cigarette lying on the floor of our living room (we'd had no guests round and my thirteen year old sister doesn't smoke)2) I've smelled cigarette smoke on both of my parents breath on several separate occasions3) One time, when my mum returned from the supermarket, she accidentally left her plastic bag in the front room. I happened to glance inside and to my utter horror found a box of cigarettes4) Last night, I went outside and I was hit by the smell of cigarette smoke. My parents both jumped up guiltily and simultaneously approached me, asking me random questions in a nervous-excited manner (clearly, they were trying to distract me)Well, they should feel guilty because, as a child, I was brought up on the stories of each of my parents valiantly quitting smoking in their youth. Throughout my life, whenever the topic of drugs came up, these anecdotes were triumphantly reiterated. In fact, they have been so frequently recited that they have almost become an ingrained part of my thinking, which is probably why I never thought to question their bold claims before now.I can't believe they deceived me in such a way! And they are so hypocritical to tell me not to do drugs, while they are smoking like a pair of chimneys in secret!I am at a complete loss. I mean, I've never been put in this kind of situation before. I guess it's all part of the learning journey, aka Life. :PHowever, I would really appreciate your opinions on this. Do you think I should keep the info to myself? Or confront one/both of my parents? Or something else?Thanks for helping me out.Best wishes 3
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male
reader, adamskidude +, writes (14 October 2009):
 My mother used to smoke, but she quit when she fell pregnant the first time around, but, im pretty sure that she's had one or two secretly.I mentioned the funny smell of smoke in the house and she said she didnt know what i was talking about.But since i confronted her, no more odd signs or anything.Just mention it to them, it might send them on a guilt trip ^.^
A
male
reader, steelpicker +, writes (14 October 2009):
 It's a difficult one. Remember that nicotine is a drug that causes a physiological addiction. That is to say that the body reacts badly to not having it, rather than just a mental/psychological reaction.The problem seems to be the deception rather than anything else. Smoking is a terrible thing, never start. They want what's best for you I am sure.Maybe they worry that if you are exposed to it that you might think it normal and take it up yourself.If it causing trust issues then I think you need to deal with it. I would wait until you actually catch one of them smoking to deal with it. I don't smoke, I rarely drink alcohol, and never touch drugs.And, my mother had smoked on occasion when I was younger and not told me. I was really upset. She apologised profusely though as she knew how much I hated smoking.I hope everything works out for you.
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