A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I really like one of my best friends ex's. I don't know how to cope with this, I've known her longer than I've known him but am closer to him as a friend. The problem is I want to try a relationship with her but not to lose my friend, at the moment neither of them know I have any interest in her. But I'm so close to telling her i like her because I've wanted to do it for a few years now. We did go out together a few years back but it was a silly teenage thing that lasted a few hours. So obviously at one point she did but I'm not sure now, she seems pretty honest with me when we talk and tells me things that are sort of best kept private, but it's just awkward, help?
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male
reader, dirtball  +, writes (16 August 2010):
 I would talk to your friend first. Let him know you like her, but wanted to get his thoughts on it before you tried anything. My guess is that he won't mind too much, but it can make things awkward. My best friend dated one of my ex-girlfriends in the past. He asked me first, which made things easier to deal with on my end. Sometimes it isn't what we do, but how we do them that defines a relationship. Taking things in an order that shows respect can go a long way.
A
male
reader, Cloverfield +, writes (16 August 2010):
 This really isnt any problem at all..... just tell your mate first, im sure he'll say its fine by him.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (16 August 2010):
 I know in girl world u have to ask ur best friend if it's ok to date their ex..not sure how it goes in guy world..but u guys are probably more lenient. If ur bestie gives the "go ahead" then I would have a talk with her and ask if she would consider rekindling an old romance. Do it immediately bc now that she's telling u private matter (thats good) but it can be bad bc u could go into the friend zone with her and that is VERY hard to get out of it. Act quick! I got my fingers crossed
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (16 August 2010):
 If your best friend doesn't have any residual feelings for this ex of his, I say it's fine. Go for it and tell her!
I hope that helps.
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