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I just can't get a proper erection and it's driving me mad...

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Question - (23 November 2005) 4 Answers - (Newest, 25 November 2005)
A male , anonymous writes:

I am male, 56 and have had sex problems all my life. I have almost never been able to get an erection. If I take Viagra I can get one but as soon as I enter I lose it. It is so frustrating. I sometimes wonder if I wasn't sexually abused as a child and have repressed it. The fact that I occasionally have and with Viagra can get an erection leads me to believe there is nothing pysically wrong. I am at my wit's end. What can I do?

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A reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2005):

The answers already given are great. Definitly talk to your doctor as there may be some physical of psychological problem that is giving you difficulty. I've experienced that this kind of problem can compound itself. If you're having problems, the fear that you will have difficulties may make it even more difficult to get or hold an erection.

This can be tricky, but when you need an erection, thinking about an erection is the fastest way to loose it or prevent it. Try putting your mind somewhere else (or nowhere at all). It's surprising, but not thinking about it can be that fastest ways to make things work down there.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2005):

Get your GP or practice nurse to check out your heart disease risk such as blood pressure and cholesterol. Ask them to check your hormone levels in case your testosterone level is low. Viagra has a cummunlative effect and you may need to have the dose increased. It also works better if you have taken 1 a couple of times a week for a few weeks. It's affect can also be variable so you may still get a poor result in between good results. Ask for Cialis which takes longer to work, about 3/4hr, but lasts for 36 hours. Remember that these drugs do not give you an erection without stimulation, so you won't suddenly get hard when you have not masturbated to an erection first.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2005):

I suggest you go to a sex therapist or a psychologist as I believe a person's libido is deeply connected to their brain. If all physical problems have been rulesd out by your doctor...it could be psychological. Have it looked in to. Anxiety, apprehension or dread, accompanied by tension can prevent you from staying erect, as well.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (24 November 2005):

I'm sorry you feel you are at your wits end - do not fear - there is help out there!!

You have obviosly considered that your problem maybe psycologically associated but this may not be to do with childhood abuse, it maybe something disassociated with direct sexual experiences but something else which your mind has not yet come to tems with, this can often be associate with childhood but also maybe linked to an adult experience. It will be really difficult but if you have exaussted physical optioins then you may want to consider seeking conselling adice with a reputable registeded sexual dysfunction clinic in your area (these are easy to find via the internet)You may also want to consider the relationships you have had with women (particularly your mum)

If you have not exausted physical problems, consider the amount of alcohol you drink, if you take drugs, how much excercise you get, your stress levels, if you suffer from depression etc, these can all contribute to your ablitlies in turn - someting to think about!

good luck honney!

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