A
female
age
36-40,
*eau_Gallante
writes:Everytime I go for a guy that I NOTICE FIRST or that I WANT FIRST, it seems like I am either being (from what my family says) desperate. I had a talk with my father and he said that, but when I do not go for a guy that I WANT and NOTICE FIRST, he says that I need to stop letting something I WANT pass me by. I mean, what? Like...huh?! Did I miss something? I want the guys that I happen to notice first, but they are either to busy looking at the glamorous chick in class, talking on the phone everytime I see them, do not notice me at all...Or I get accused of being desperate or not going after I want.The reason I do not go because first my self-esteem is NOT LOW and I do not approach someone who is not even taking much notice. I usu. forget about them because they always come to me when I dont care for them anymore. When I give them a chance, then Im being desperate. Im seriously just going stop taking advice (not including you agony aunts) from anyone because I want to date who I like!!! And not wait around for anyone.
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female
reader, Beau_Gallante +, writes (9 August 2009):
Beau_Gallante is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thamks for the advice! I realize that my dad does not want me to really deal with ANY guys. He said that no guy is good enough for his daughter, lol.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 July 2009): Well really i think you're fine and well off and don't need advice or to listen to what your father is telling you. Just keep on keepin on!
Sy.
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A
female
reader, Beau_Gallante +, writes (27 July 2009):
Beau_Gallante is verified as being by the original poster of the questionLol, that is funny that you asked me that. I asked him what grade he got in class a few weeks ago and he said he hardly checks his school email....and told me he got a "B"
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2009): Are you sure he checks his email? I check mine about once every three months
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A
female
reader, Beau_Gallante +, writes (26 July 2009):
Beau_Gallante is verified as being by the original poster of the questionLol, cool I emailed him once during the semester...and then agian a few days ago.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2009): Prehaps you should stop telling your father everytime you like or ask out a guy! that way you won't have to hear his judgement.
You miss a word there.. you emialed him two weeks ago, days ago, minutes ago, years ago..?
~Sy.
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A
female
reader, Beau_Gallante +, writes (26 July 2009):
Beau_Gallante is verified as being by the original poster of the questionHello Sincerly Yours,
Thanks for responding. No it is not every week, it is usually every month or couple of weeks. If I am dealing with someone I try not to deal with the next guy until I get over my feelings for the one I truly want. Like this semester there has been one guy that I have noticed the whole semester and I sent him two emails because he talked to me closer to the end of semester...but I really like him. I actually dated two guys because he doesnt seem to be interested and talks to a lot of girls. Both guys were not for me and the one I want is so busy flirting with a lot of girls that I do not know...
Anyways I emailed him two ago and my father said well, he does not have to jump up and reply right away. Thats fine, but then he said that I am being desperate...and I am not because I stayed quiet the whole semester.
I rarely approach or tell a guy how I feel unless he makes me feel extremely comfortable, he finally notices me or we just happened to connect, etc.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2009): Well while i was reading this, i started thinking "the only thing she really needs to change is how much she listens to what other people think about what she's doing." But at the very end there, you pinned that one, so I really think you're very well off and will have a fine future for yourself.
But do consider how many people you are approaching. If there are several every week or so, then i can see where people can think you come off a little desperate. But i don't know any information like that. So as far as I can tell, you're fine. And besides, it's nice to see a woman who doesn't think that men should be doing all the work.
take care.
~Sy.
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