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I didn't feel anything while having sex, is this weird?

Tagged as: Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (10 April 2011) 4 Answers - (Newest, 11 April 2011)
A female United Kingdom age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Sex wasn't really how I thought it would be.. I've have it twice now, and no times did I actually feel anything.

Well, I felt him like. Inside me, but I didn't really get a buzz, or any particularly nice feel out of it.

Of course the first time hurt a lot, but then it stopped hurting. But I just put down feeling nothing to it just being the first time.

The second tome was about 3 weeks after the first time, Cause I wanted time to heal from the first time, cause it would be stupid to have sex just after first having it. And yes That still hurt a bit when he first went in. But still, I got NOTHING out of it,

I read up, and it said that most women feel nothing, or get nothing out of sex.

Is this true. Or is there something wrong with me that I don't really feel anything.

And yes, I did want to have sex, and yes I do have VERY strong feelings for the guy I had sex with, so it's not a case of the wrong person.

I just want to know, what is the normal feeling of having sex for a women, and is there any facts or anything I should know?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (11 April 2011):

Its normal not to feel much. How much you do feel really depends on your partners technique and how much foreplay there is. If theres little foreplay and your partner doesnt have a very skilled technique then for the most part you wont feel much at all.

Films make me laugh, where the couple jump into bed and within 20 seconds shes writhing about in ecstasy and having big O's. We wish! Its not really like that.

Some men view sex as they viewed their first flat pack wardrobe from Ikea. Get the flat pack home, totally disregard all the instructions in their haste to get it up. Figure out off the top of their head, what bits go where...and then go for it!! Thats ok short term but things will start to fall apart eventually. And its not as satisfying as taking plenty of time, following the instructions carefully and doing an excellent job that endures the test of time.

So invest in a couple of good sex guides, either books or dvds and go through them with your partner. It will make sex much more enjoyable for you and if he enjoys giving pleasure as well as receiving it, he will enjoy love making far more too.

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A male reader, wiseoldman United Kingdom +, writes (11 April 2011):

As a barely post-virgin, you have no physical idea of what you like sexually, or how it should feel, just what you have previously fantasized might be nice. At a very basic level, sex can be compared to any sport or hobby- from riding a bicycle to playing cards or learning gymnastics- at the beginning you're not too good at it, and it's not much fun or particularly satisfying. Take your time, give it time, communicate your feelings honestly and you'll find it improves.

But there's nothing wrong with serial monogamy either- the same ingredients, prepared differently can produce a dish which you might love or hate- in hte same fashion, different men are differently sized, have a different natural fragrance, or different styles of lovemaking. You haven't sampled the buffet yet, so you have no idea what's on the menu

Sometimes your first guy is simply that, rather thean the man you eventually will decide is the right one to share your life with- and that's your business alone, and no-one else's.

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A female reader, daniellemccartney United States +, writes (11 April 2011):

Women have a "g-spot" I don't know the technical term. But it's usually right above your cervix like where your vagina starts and that's what causes women to orgasm which is why most don't actually orgasm during penetration. I've had this problem with my ex-boyfriend.

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A female reader, WishAlot United Kingdom +, writes (11 April 2011):

WishAlot agony auntIm with you on this one...I dont get any feelings of my bf being in me. I get turned on beforehand and get wet but during penetration I feel nothing, in fact sometimes a little pain.

I always wondered to if it was normal but maybe it is as I do know most cant climax during penetration.

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