A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've heard that when you ask if a man loves you, and he says "yes", nine times out of ten this is the truth. BUT I've also heard that men define love differently. Should I be concerned if my guy has never told me how he defines love? I know it's not typical of guys to do this, but I hope we are on the same page. How do you men folk define love, and do you believe it typically varies from a woman's viewpoint? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (7 October 2010):
 What Cerberus described is generally real love. I do not think anyone can really disagree with that unless they have never really felt strong, undying love. I think the most undeniable feature of real love is the almost irresistable need to put another's needs before your own.
I hope that helps.
A
male
reader, Bowman  +, writes (7 October 2010):
Love is one of those things that are so difficult to define and I would agree with Cerberus that it varies not just between the sexes, but also varies within the gender groups. To complicate things a little further is that there are different types of love, for example I love my sister every bit as much as I love my wife, it’s just different.
I would suggest that many men, particularly the younger one’s tend to mistake love with sex, whether by design or not, the logic being that if you tell a girl you love her she is more likely to sleep with you, even though this is a real misconception.
For me love is wanting to spend the rest of your life with that person, it’s an all-consuming feeling both on a physical and an emotional level, it’s that point in which you can never imagine your life without that person. Essentially I would suggest that these are the things that are common in both men and women and for me it suggests that perhaps the divide in how we define love isn’t that wide.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2010): This is a very good but complex question. I personally believe that the type of love can differ from person to person, and a lot of people get love confused for lust.
In my opinion, love towards a partner is, being truthfully honest, open, trustful, and caring. Being there for him/her for whatever reason. Love means devoting yourself to that person through the highs and lows, even for example in a major fight or argument you would still do anything for them to make them happy , but also keeping in mind that u want to keep them happy.
Then again I could be wrong.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2010): my man defines his love by showing me and i know its true has a problem telling me, cause he his the shy type like me, and that saying actions speak louder than words is true, i suppose all men will be different how they express there love, but i asked a quiestion on here similar to this, i was asking why does my man find it hard to tell me how he feels when he shows me with actions, got loads of answers, some said hes not into you which upset me greatly cause i know different, then i got another saying they take there time until they feel its right, then they express there love, cause a man dont want to put all his love into one girl, he feels he his gonna date, marry, and find out it a fake love, and thats the answer i kept too, not the one hes not into you cause he dont tell you he loves you RUBBISH, found out that some men wait until it feels right to define there love, i am happy the way mine shows me, i was quite worried at first with him not been able to say how he feels, but once i got some answers on here made me realise that saying actions speak louder than words is true saying , so when he looks deep into my eyes like he does when we are together, thats how i know my man loves me, dont have to really say he says it with his eyes, when he looks at me and what he does for me, so i am sure you will be getting a lot of male and female answers on here about this question you asked on here.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2010): A persons definition of love varies based on their desires and needs, physical, emotional and sexual. Not just among men does it vary but amongst women it does too.
In general though the same things apply for all, love, the inability to stop thinking about that other person, the desire to protect them and make them happy to have their best interests at heart and take care of them, to satisfy them, the desire to have them in your life, a sexual desire for them and a physical, mental and emotional attraction. These are things we all feel, if you don't then in my opinion it's not love.
But other posters might disagree, or add more to that.
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