A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:How do you know as a parent when to step into a relationship that you feel is unhealthy for your daughter. She is 17 and has been going out with the same guy for a little over 2 years. Since he has left for college in the fall he has gotten very controlling. She doesn't go out or do alot because she doesn't want to upset him. He even has a say in where she wants to apply for a job. Meanwhile he is living the college life and does what ever he wants. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2007): All you can do is be there for your daughter, leave magazines lying around with stories like your daughter's in them for her to read.
Talk to her but don't lecturer her or tell her what she can and cannot do because at her age she will rebel against you even if she knows you are right! Encourage her to go out more, get her friends to as well... but don't pressure her into anything!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2007): hi,
i have just turned 18, a few monthes ago i was in a really bad realationship, but nobody knew i just made everyone think everything was great. If my mum had known i would have really wanted her advice, but looking back on that time i know i wouldn't have listened to her and just done what i wanted, because im a teenager and we all do what we THINK is right and dismiss really good advice. I think the best way to talk to your daughter is the write her a letter so you can write down everything you want to say to her, and she will deffinately read it all. And it will also give her time to think. I really hope what i have said can help you in anyway. x
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 December 2007): You can't do much of anything by the time she's 17. If she's tolerating being walked on at that age then she's probably gonna keep on doing it for a while longer.
All you can do is tell her the facts of life. Not about the birds & the bees, but about the fact that she can choose to give away all her love/respect to someone and that simply does not mean he will ever give her back the same in return.
She is just gonna have to learn the hard way that she cannot change someone else.
There's another one born every minute.
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A
female
reader, steph.x  +, writes (20 December 2007):
i suggest that you watch her like a hawlk..! but from far away.! at her age weather she knows your are right or not she will fight to prove you wrong.. im quite young and i remember how i used to react, be her friend more than a mum. just think of how your saying things to her and think how she maight take it.. go back to teens and try to remember what is was like..
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A
female
reader, ladycharm +, writes (20 December 2007):
 i think you can voice your concerns to your daughter but in the end she has to make the decision herself a lot of perents who interfear with there daughters relationships end up getting resented if this relationship is a mistake then its one she has to make i no its hard but in the end its her life and only she can live it
if you have any more questions please write back good luck
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