A
male
age
36-40,
*noms
writes:I seem to attract alot of attention when i dont try, but when i show an interest..thats when the games begin. so whats the best way to take it from the 'initial interest' and skip this boring repetitive game play? and how can you tell the difference between hard to get and not interested? thanx Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): They might not be interested I'm afraid, if they haven't given you the chance to even "see each other" - not necessarily on an official "date"... if this is the case.Maybe they have not taken your hints or maybe they prefer a more direct approach (the man taking the lead, being more straightforward but not rude) - this can be your plan B. Tell one of them you like her or that you would like to be given a chance to know each other. If they play mind games "forever" it's a pity to be wasting so much of your time being focused on unavailable people. And you may as well try and build bridges of friendship in the future, best relationships in my opinion derive from friendship. Good luck!
A
male
reader, anoms +, writes (11 May 2009):
anoms is verified as being by the original poster of the question thanx for your answers but you see i have two women that wont take a hint when im clearly not interested and its turned borderline harassment, on the other hand i know two women i would love to take out but whenever i try to arange somthing..they play these hard to get mind games, its asif women want me to be rude lol i understand what your saying about "time to discover and asses how you get along as a couple" but these situations seem pretty unproductive when certain girls make simple things quite difficult, because in the end..after all the games and the dissinterested guises we always make a full circle but i would rather skip the off putting fooling, i was guessing that an immediate date would be the best way, but now im unsure
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 May 2009): The courtship, which you call "a boring repetitive play" is not just meant to drain you out of creative ideas to impress your date, it is a phase meant to provide you with time to discover and asses how you get along as a couple, it is a time to familiarise with each other before you jump in head first without the slightest idea if things can work out. As for your second point, you must insist to know. If the messages you receive spell out on a recurrent basis a clear, definite N-O the person is not interested. I won't cover the reasons why a person can play hard to get. In short, it can be done as a means of caution, not necessarily in a playful fashion or to put a spoke in your wheel.
...............................
A
male
reader, philipgifts  +, writes (11 May 2009):
 You will know how they are looking at you. This guys hot or this guy is doesn't have a chance. First its eye contact, and a cute smerk or smile from you than they will either show interest or they will give you a look like not a chance. Then you aproach them and start a conversation. If your out and about and you meet someone talk for five min. then say I'd like to talk more, maybe we could get coffee later and could I get your number. If your in college you'll have more opertunity to try this out, asking them to go out for lunch. Never ask a person out the first time you see them, bc most likely they'll either play hard toget or they will blow you off completely.
...............................
|
