A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I have been single for 4 years and now I have a special someone i have met. We want to have sex but its been so long since ive been intimate with somebody its like I'm starting all over again. i don't know what to do , say, how to act. my mind races and I fall apart. It makes me so nervous id almost rather not have sex at all. How can I relax and enjoy myself?? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Olivia(Y).  +, writes (25 March 2009):
 Talk to your partner and talk things through about what you are going to do, when and where.
Before you jump straight into sex play around with each other. Find out what each other likes. Trying different things will help build trust and make you feel more relaxed.
Before you have sex try giving each other a massage or try lots of foreplay!
Good luck babe
xxx
A
female
reader, superrrshawna +, writes (25 March 2009):
 Oh God, story of my life.
I haven't had sex with someone in the longest time, and I feel the exact same way. It's like you're a virgin all over again, and all the same worries come up!
Just explain to the special someone how you feel, that you're nervous, that you haven't been with anyone for a while.
If they're as special as you claim, they'll understand, maybe even think it's cute, and will do their best to ease you back into things.
Good luck!
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