A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:alright, long question here: ok so about a year or so ago i had told this girl whom i had been really good friends with for about 2 years that i liked her as more than a friend and she was super cool about it but she told me that she liked someone else which i accepted and so we decided to remain friends. Anyway we have gotten together a number times since then and i want to make this clear, she has in no way shape or form done anything to lead me on in anyway, e.g. saying "we can't be together right now" but every time i see her and hang out with her I end up falling for her again and even though i know that nothing is ever going to happen between us i still feel the same way about her because she is such an amazing person and we both have very similar interests and just knowing that we share similar interests and really like spending time together and still not being able to be anything more than friends.Anyway my question is how can I manage these feelings every time i am around her because i have already made the decision that I will not cut her out as a friend because she has done all that she can do to make sure our friendship stays in tact and I want to do the same.Any help is appreciated, thanks! Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Uncle PJ  +, writes (1 March 2012):
 It's a tough thing to do. But because you feel for her this much you already know that you won't do anything that could spoil the friendship because you still very much want her in your life.Although it doesn't feel like it, she mustn't be the girl for you. And you mustn't be the guy for her. It's going to suck but you cannot let any feeling mask how you act as a friend to her.Try to avoid talking about feelings with her unless she asks you for relationship help etc. Just try to act normal around her and keep the feelings in the back of your mind, like a secret between you and yourself. You will find someone else out there at some point trust me. They will be the right girl for you and your feelings will be more than you're feeling right now. Don't do anything untoward and keep the friendship going as normal and you should be fine. Hopefully this helps, and good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 February 2012): HI
You wont be able to :( If you have such strong feelings they dont just go away. Its a horrible feeling I know, I have actually been inlove with a guy for the past 9yrs, I know we can never be, but it still dont change how I feel about him :( The thing I have done to try my best to move on is simply stay away from him, cut all contact, It dont go, but it makes it so much easier. I know his my SOULMATE, but unfortunately in another lifetime, as his married and has his soulmate. Sometimes we cross paths, and it hurts like hell to know that another woman is by his side, BUT thats just life so I have to deal with it. I really do feel for you, hang on in there sweetie, you will be lucky soon and find a perfect soulmate. xoxox
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