A
female
age
36-40,
*ayK87
writes:Okay, So I have been dating my brothers best friend I have known for 10 years. We have been together for almost two years. And lived together for about a year and a half he is my second real boyfriend. I have been in love with him since I was about 17, he is sweet, kind, loving, everything I have ever wanted. He always made me feel special even when we were just friends, always spent alot of time with me, was very attentive with me. Never left me home alone, or anything like that always included me in everything. He knows how I am I need a lot attention. Well in November he was talking of moving to Texas, for a job. I cant just move because I have epilepsy, and we talked about this. And I got along great with his mom. Well in November he got arrested for driving on a suspended license .He was in Jail for 65 days, and we wrote just about everyday, and I visited him as much as I could, his family hardly wrote him at all. And when he got out his mother sent her boyfriends brother to pick him up and told the guard not to let him leave with me. The guard told her hes a grown man he cant tell him who to leave with. Well he came home with me and was with me for three days, then left for Texas. ( I live in Florida) Well he has no cell phone and they wont let him call me, and are trying to convince him I'm a slut ( And I have only been with two guys and was a virgin till I was 19!) And now hes not talking to me online or calling me. Its killing me driving me crazy. I love him so much and I feel like hes not trying to talk to me. And I feel like they are convincing him I'm a bad person. I don't know what to do, I don't know if I should wait for him, or to just brake up with him which would kill me. I don't know if I'm over reacting or what. Hes been gone since February 14th, and only called me 3 times so far, the last time because I told him I felt like he didn't care on myspace. He felt bad and apologized. But hasn't talked to me in 5 days. I think Im losing my mind. I don't know what to think I really need advice!!!
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female
reader, KayK87 +, writes (19 April 2010):
KayK87 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for all the advise guys....We desided to go our separate ways....Well he did anyways!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2010): Now that you shared that last bit about possibly moving, and that you both talked about it, it seems worth holding onto, but only if he's still as interested about being with you. Maybe work on that part of him before moving to that place solely because of the relationship with him. If he's as interested as you, and his mother's probably the only road block trying to deter him, go for it. If he's adult age, it should be none of her business who he likes or wants to be with, so don't let him use her as an excuse either, though. Make sure it's about what he wants, and that he promises to stay by your side, no matter what. I know it's difficult when he's living with his parent(s), but if he's serious enough about you, and you're willing to move to the town he lives in, if he can't promise and stick to plans to move in with you, then it's a waste of your time when you get there. Good luck. Parents can be very judgemental and cause alot more harm than good, when you're an adult, because they don't know the whole story when it comes to their childrens' relationships, but they feel they can just intervene anyway. Sometimes parents are good to go to, but don't let them run your life if you can help it. I hope everything works out for you, but if you don't see any progress in the way he's acting now, then I would consider not trying too hard to go his way, either. Go with your instincts and how you believe he feels about you.
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A
female
reader, KayK87 +, writes (7 March 2010):
KayK87 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBefore he moved we talked of me moving there, but it will take a while for me to get a new neurologist, and doctors. And I will not live with his mother, I told him he has to have his own place for us. Before he left he told me he wants me to be there with him.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2010): If he lives in Texas and you can't, it's already broken up and over with, other than casual texting or talking over the phone or the internet, unless he told you he's coming back. He must feel there's nothing much to keep going, being you can't physically see each other or do anything together. I would move on and keep your options open for next guy. Long distance relationships don't work unless there's a plan to honestly move close enough together to have a 'real relationship'. Texting is bullshitting and phone calls are annoying when you can't see each other or do anything else together. Don't wait for him to come back to where you live, either..just date whoever else you feel you may really like, because he could also be full of shit if he does promise to or say he's going to try to move where you live in the future. If he has no intentions of ever living around you, physically, and you can't move to where he lives because of your epilepsy, then nothing will ever come out of the false hopes you might have, by dialing long distance or the feeling of power texting gives you while it wastes your time each day.
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