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female
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*_J_K_J
writes: My bf goes out 1 to 2 times a week, he either doesn't come home after work or he says he will be back in an hour and doesn't show up until the next morning. If I call him he won't answer his phone and yells at me if he does. He drinks and does some not acceptable drugs. He tells me him and his friends were partying in a motel room. I have partied with him a few times when we first met. I know what takes place in these motel rooms. He says I have nothing to worry about. I love my bf and this drug has became a problem for him, everytime he drinks he has to do it. What should I do ????? I love him and don't want him to lose everything he has over stupidity.. He is not 18 anymore he is 30, and hurting his life and family What should I do??
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 November 2005): I think this man is being totally selfish, it sounds like he wants to have his cake and eat it! - he wants to go out and have fun like a single man, but then come home to a loving girlfriend when he's tired and bored of partying. I know it's hard to accept but he's not acting like a loving, happy partner to you - he is being totally irresponsible and not considering your feelings at all. I think you need to try and talk to him, find out whether he has an addiction problem, if so whether he is prepared to sort it out with your support and talk to professionals - and if it's that he just wants to have fun, maybe you need to find someone else who wants YOUR sort of fun - spending time with you and your family - not someone who wants to spend 1 or 2 nights a week in oblivion escaping from reality. Good luck, I really feel for you, it is so hard and at the end of the day we don't choose who we love.
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reader, Angel-lee +, writes (25 November 2005):
leave him, he really isnt worth it. If he loved you he wouldnt be acting like this. His behaviour is out of order. If he wants to carry on the way he is going then let him but you must walk away. He will realise what he has lost...believe me
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