A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm in a long-distance relationship with the love of my life in another country, and I spent the summer with him, meeting him for the very first time. I had been a virgin, and I had never had a real boyfriend before him (never kissed or touched anyone else). About half way through the summer, there were three nights where after we had had sex, and we'd both fallen asleep, I had waken up in the night and been really turned on. I played with myself, and made myself cum with my boyfriend sleeping beside me. Later on when it came up in a conversation, he got really mad at me, and started blaming himself for how I acted. He thinks he wasn't good enough in bed, but that's not even the case. He's amazing in bed, and it just turned me on to think about what we had done before sleeping. He says I should have woken him up, but I would have felt bad if I had. All I know is that while I was masturbating, I was thinking of him, and I don't think I really did anything wrong. Can someone please help me understand why he got so angry about it? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionWe were together online for 9 months prior meeting. He says it would have been fine if I had done it while he was awake, or even if he was just out of the room (he says it turns him on to think of walking in on me doing it), but the thought of me next to him as he slept just made him mad.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2010): he's a bit too insecure and prudish in my estimation. And maybe too rigid in his views. Such a dogmatic judgemental stance so early in the relationship does not auger well for the future. What else about you does he want to control? He may be good in bed but where is his acceptance of your rights and your sensuality? I think you two have some talking to do.
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