A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I want some opinions on what to do with this situation.I went out with this guy three times. He paid each time, was a total gentleman, didn't overstep one boundary and so on. I for some reason freaked out and told him I wasn't ready for more than friendship. I've been treated badly in the past and I think I was expecting him to disappear or never call again so I jumped the gun and dropped him first. He wanted to take things slow but I was just not in the right frame of mind.Anyway, I realized I made a mistake and after a month of doing nothing about it I contacted him. I just said hi, nothing more. He replied and asked me out. We went out, had a great day and at the end he kissed me goodnight. We didn't make plans to see each other again but when I joked that I owe him (he paid for the date again) he said 'maybe next time.'So now...I want to pursue this further but what do I do?- do I let him contact me?- do I contact him and ask him out?In the past if I've 'chased' a guy it's never worked out. I have no idea what to do!!! Reply to this Question |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, guillaume  +, writes (14 September 2009):
 Hi,
The past doesn't equal the future.
From what i can see here, you met a very suitable match for you. but, as you say, you made your past disappointments sabotage any possible other outcome for you. It wasn't his fault.
He has given you another chance here. A lot of guys wouldn't have bothered but this likes you.
Get in touch, tell him you'd like to see him some more and just let things happen. He has already said he wants to go slowly so he probably has picked up on your anxiety. But you did nothing wrong, you had past disappointments.
As I said, the past definitely doesn't equa the future and perhaps this guy might be your surprise package. Take care, G xx
A
female
reader, Ginalolabridga + ♥, writes (14 September 2009):
 Ask him out and make it clear you want to treat him and pay for it that way your still getting to see him and the time spent together you make sure it is quality time talking and discussing things.
If you realised this was a mistake dumping him the first time around due to your insecurities, dont allow that to happen a second time now that you have his interest and attention again.
Good Luck.
Gina
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 September 2009): hi, i must say i think this guy sounds genuine, he has already said he wants to take things slow. he is maybe unsure about what to do as he doesn't want to upset you. You could always contact him and say hi, how are you? that way it is leaving the door open for him to respond and take things forward. i think if you take it steady, go out and have fun then everything will work out. good luck
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