A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi all, would appreciate your thoughts on my current situation. Have been with my man 6 years, I am always askin him if we still want the same things etc, and we both have kids of our own. He always sayss yaaaahhh. Any way recently he gets ratty if I mention that Id love a child together and I have now found he point blank doesnt. Why didnt he tell me this earlier? also despite him buying me a beautiful ring quite early on into our thing he freaks over the mention of marriage too. Its always "ah we gotta do this first " or " ah arent u happy as we are?"Now I get the impression he strung me along all along and I feel as if I am just here till somethin better comes along. Am I wrong to end it? I always wanted a child with the one I end up with and I do want marriage ? he isnt going to give me those and it annoys me why he should be the one who gets it all his way??? thoughts please?thank u Reply to this Question
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2012): "he insisted I have a termination two years ago "
That may have been an indication he never really wanted a child, despite telling you otherwise.
A good way to know if you should believe him is whether what he SAYS is consistent with what he DOES. If his words contradict his actions, then believe his actions. Easy to say something and not mean it, pointless to do something and not mean it.
I'm sorry, but if you're so needy and dependent that you're willing to waste your life on this guy because you "love" him, then I have no sympathy for you. If you don't respect yourself enough to leave him and find someone more compatible, then why should he respect you?
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2012): I know you are right but I love him. What makes it worse is that he insisted I have a termination two years ago saying it was not the right time and it kills me to realize it is never goin to be that time. I know you are right and I know what I should do, however I am not sure I can . Thank you for your advice .
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 May 2012): "I always wanted a child with the one I end up with and I do want marriage ? he isnt going to give me those and it annoys me why he should be the one who gets it all his way??? thoughts please?"If you want a child and marriage with a guy, find a guy who really wants a child and marriage. It's been six years, he knows by all he needs to do is tell you what you want to hear while doing nothing to prove it; he's willing to string you along for as long as you're willing to believe what keeps repeating inorder you want to hear to keep stringing you along, which is indefinitely. He's not waiting to offer what you want to someone better, he doesn't want you want and knows you're willing to settle. It's been six years, nothing's changed, all he needs to keep you are around are vague unfulfilled promises. Smarten up.
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