My boss and I text each other, now his wife is furious at me. Did I do something wrong?
Q. This is a strange one I'm having mixed opinions about. Basically my boss is 20 years older than me, and married... and male also! However we text back and forth just silly jokes, general day to day stuff, and sometimes just to see how each other are ...
A. 29 August 2011: Avoiding the APPEARANCE of impropriety is every bit as important as avoiding impropriety. In this case, I believe you: you probably went into this with good intentions. However, as others have noted, this is a situation that could easily be ... (read in full...)
How can I deal with this emotionally dead girl who I seem to want more from?
Q. A few weeks ago, I discovered routines and methods of being able to approach girls who would be rated say a 9 out of 10 so to speak and who reject any male that gives them attention. Anyway, I approached one girl etc and got through her usua...
A. 27 August 2011: I agree with the others: you are attracted to the challenge. This is not to say that the girl isn't awesome in her own right. However, as a general rule, the basis of stuff like PUA is the psychology where people tend to get obsessed with folks ... (read in full...)
The married man who I am seeing, accuses me of cheating on him!!
Q. I am absolutly livid and hope somebody can either 1) Persuade me I'm wrong or, 2) Prove me right! I have been seeing a man who is married for a while now and I have stayed faithfull since day one. He also tells me he doesn't sleep with his w...
A. 27 August 2011: He is cheating on his wife with you ... yet you believe that he is capable of fidelity to you?
News flash: he is reacting to you in this way because he is trying to push you away. There IS another girlfriend besides yourself. I'd put money do... (read in full...)
Can she claim for child-support payments?
Q. Hi there! Id like to ask if a woman who tricked a man to get herself pregnant can still claim for child support. You see, I'm married to a guy who already has an illegitimate child before we met. The woman admitted she deceived the guy by asking him ...
A. 27 August 2011: According to Canadian law, the circumstances of the child's birth would have NO bearing whatsoever on potential child support. All that matters is (a) is there a child involved, and (b) what are the financial holdings of each parent?
In other wo... (read in full...)
My affair ended abruptly and the lady just disappeared without saying a word.
Q. Hi! I am 32 years old and I am married with 2 kids. I have been married for almost 6 1/2 years now and had been having problems with my marriage. I have been working so hard in communicating with my wife what the problems are but she just doesn't...
A. 2 July 2011: Hello, my friend.
I'm sorry that you have to learn this the hard way, but here it is ... affairs do not get closure. Affairs, by their very nature, exist outside of socially-sanctioned parameters. What that means is that while the affair w... (read in full...)
I want to marry him but not his kids!
Q. I love my boyfriend hugely and we are engaged to be married. He has two children from a previous relationship ,5 and 4. Though the children are relatively well behaved and love me I find it really difficult to accept. I never want children (though i ...
A. 2 July 2011: Kids are a dealbreaker.
If you want kids and he doesn't, the relationship is over.
If he wants kids (or already has them) and you do not want kids, the relationship is over.
There's nothing for you to change, mull over, consider, etc. Th... (read in full...)
Emotionally abusive, untrusting, 10 year older boyfriend wants kids with me NOW, or else he's gone.
Q. Hello everyone. Some background info for my question: I'm 22, my boyfriend is 32. We've been living together about 2 years. We have had some problems in the past due to his emotional unstability. He has been jealous and paranoid, he has been emo...
A. 2 July 2011: GET OUT NOW. This guy is trying to control your life. He will knock you up and leave you holding the baby. And if you want to know how I know, I can reference at least 20 women that I know personally who were in the exact same position. Another p... (read in full...)
My married manager and I are invovled in an affair, and I want out--but I don't want lose my job!!
Q. Need some advice please. My married manager who I for the last year have seen more as an uncle and he's a great deal older than me, i'm only 20. He's met my parents several times and I always saw him more like a caring uncle than my manager. However ...
A. 7 June 2011: This is a situation in which he is setting you up to be abused, or worse. This is not a tenable situation.
For unemployment and/or legal purposes, you should keep track of all emails and other correspondence between you and him, in case you have... (read in full...)
Too tight to have sex and the doctor is no help!
Q. Look this might sound stupid but I really need help. I have been trying to have sex for three years. I have a long term partner, everything is good. I am just very very tight! At first I couldnt even get my OWN finger in, let alone a penis, but now ...
A. 7 June 2011: Google "vaginismus", as what you describe sounds an awful lot like that.
Also, you may want to see an OB/GYN and get some references for an even better doctor. This is a medical condition and there is help out there, but you have to get soli... (read in full...)
He asaid he doesn't know if he wants to be with me - should I break up with him or wait for him to make up his mind?
Q. What would you do if your boyfriend told you he doesn't know if he wants to be with you or not? Would you break up with him, or hang on and wait for him to make up his mind? Thank you for any answers. ...
A. 7 June 2011: Dump him!
Don't be so passive about your time, which he is wasting.... (read in full...)
Every time he has any sort of grievance, my boyfriend goes straight to his mom!!
Q. Every time he has any sort of grievance my boyfriend goes round to his mums s who is on her own and lives near him. Don't get me wrong I encourage him to stay close to her but she seems to have a huge influence in his life. I am not sure how to ...
A. 7 June 2011: Countless advice columns advise ladies not to date mommy's boys, and now you know why. There is nothing you can do to fix this situation. And given your age, you may want to consider moving on before it is too late.... (read in full...)
Will he leave his wife and get a divorce?
Q. I really need your advice! I have been with a guy going on 5 years but the problem is he is married. It all started when he came up to me one day at work becuase he said I looked sad and when I told him I had just broken up with my past bf, he ...
A. 6 June 2011: A man faced with the prospect of having two women compete for his attention has the tendency of keeping both women focused on fulfilling his whims, rather than choosing between the two women.
That, ultimately, is the fatal error in your logic. ... (read in full...)
Tremendous sexual tension with this guy at work, we got together against all odds, and now his dominating ex (who he broke up with, for me) claims she's pregnant. He's back with her, says I was just a shoulder to cry on!
Q. Hi, all and any advice will be greatly appreciated as I've gotten myself into a bit of a emotional pickle. In May last year I started a new job. In September a flirtation began between a colleague and I, one who unfortunately was in a 3 year rela...
A. 6 June 2011: Point #1: When faced with the prospect of having two women simultaneously, most men prefer NOT to choose between the two women but rather choose to keep them both. I should point out that he has you in this unending loop of drama, and you keep ... (read in full...)
Much older boyfriend's family doesn't approve of me!
Q. My boyfriend is 20 years older than me. He is 45 and I am 25. His family has excluded me from family events. My boyfriend got upset because recently his family had a reunion but didn't invite me. Now.. he realized on his own that his family does not ...
A. 6 June 2011: If your boyfriend will not stand up to his family on your behalf and takes his anger out on you, you have bigger problems in store than just the issue of how his family treats you.
You should be able to come to your boyfriend and talk about is... (read in full...)
Should I be concerned that she once dated a pedophile??
Q. My girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year and a half, with a short 1 month hiatus after about 3 months. I am having difficulty dealing with some issues that have come up. Her mother is currently dating the father of one of my girlfr...
A. 6 June 2011: I'd be more concerned about the story changing each time than the presence of a guy who is a few steps removed from you.
You are dealing with at least two likely unreliable narrators (possibly three, if you include your girlfriend). Assume t... (read in full...)
My friend recently told me she was abused as a child. I was too, but no one knows. Should I tell someone?
Q. one of my friends has been acting odd the last few weeks and when we all got together she admitted that she was sexually abused when she was younger. this was a big shock and we are all supporting her through it. however i can actually relate to her ...
A. 6 June 2011: You should ABSOLUTELY talk to someone about your abuse.
However, the first person that you tell does not have to be your friend. In fact, you may not want to go to her first just because she may be a little too close to the action (your family &... (read in full...)
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