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Dear Cupid > Forums > Cupid's Lounge > Biggest phobias

Biggest phobias

, posted over a year ago

I have many:

-Public speaking

-Heights

-Spiders

-Moths

I could go on but i'd be here all night.

Posted on 5 December 2010 @ 18:35 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I love moths (they're my favorite of insects), they're the symbol of hope...I was actually going to get a tattoo of one!

Have to agree with you on the public speaking - that's actually a very common one for most people.

I'm super claustrophobic and hate crowded places.

I absolutely despise hospitals, the smell and atmosphere is simply nauseating!

Posted on 5 December 2010 @ 20:20 (London time) - permalink
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tennisstar88, posted over a year ago

-Spiders have got to be my top..even if it's just no bigger than my thumbnail I still scream like a little girl.

-Snakes

-I'm also afraid of semis. In America, they seem to hog the road and I'm deathly afraid of one losing control, then smashing my car to bits.

Posted on 5 December 2010 @ 23:10 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

-Feet

*shudder*

Posted on 5 December 2010 @ 23:20 (London time) - permalink
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DenimandLace44, posted over a year ago

Snakes.....any kind of snake. Even a rubber snake...

Posted on 6 December 2010 @ 2:1 (London time) - permalink
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tennisstar88, posted over a year ago

Oh june bugs! They used to fly in my long hair when I was a kid and get stuck. Totally harmless, just huge and very loud.

Posted on 6 December 2010 @ 2:46 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Ah tennisstar, you peaked my curiosity. I didn't know what a june bug was so I Googled it. I remember seeing those bugs as a kid...yes, they have those scratchy, catchy little feet! Agh, there were a bunch of closeup pics...think I'm gonna have nightmares!

Posted on 6 December 2010 @ 6:7 (London time) - permalink
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dirtball, posted over a year ago

Needles. One reason why I'm sure I'll never be a heroin junkie! I'm getting better but the thought of getting a shot still makes me sick to my stomach.

I used to be afraid of spiders, then I moved into a basement bedroom. Now they only phase me when they drop down in front of me when I'm not expecting them.

Posted on 6 December 2010 @ 16:52 (London time) - permalink
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tennisstar88, posted over a year ago

Haha, Ampersand. I was going to say we're neighbors so those pesky bugs should be around you guys in the summer too.

Posted on 6 December 2010 @ 17:22 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

-Clowns

-Worms

-Crane flies

-Frogs

-Paris hilton

Ok, the last one isn't exactly a phobia but she's still vile and if i get a chance to bitch about her i'll take it.

Posted on 7 December 2010 @ 0:50 (London time) - permalink
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tennisstar88, posted over a year ago

Oh, yes clowns. That movie IT, scarred me for life!

Posted on 7 December 2010 @ 3:3 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Me too but i love the book.

Posted on 7 December 2010 @ 8:37 (London time) - permalink
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sarahlynn, posted over a year ago

crunchy bugs: like when you step on them and they go "crunch!" uuuuuuuaaaaagggghhhh!! just makes me sick thinkin about it. other than that, closterphobic (is that how you spell it?) hehe, even when I see somebody goofing around with another person and they don't mind their faces or mouths being covered up, I freak out

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 1:7 (London time) - permalink
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pixiegirls, posted over a year ago

I'm with you Sarahlynn on the bugs. Any roach, waterbug, and especially a Palmetto bug creeps me out more than anything else in the world....ugh!

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 7:51 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Slugsm especially when you trend on them wearing no shoes and they stick to your sock *shudder*

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 11:48 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

*Slugs

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 11:48 (London time) - permalink
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Illithid, posted over a year ago

Heights, though I've worked at breaking myself of the fear, I still get vertigo sometimes looking over balconies.

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 12:34 (London time) - permalink
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tennisstar88, posted over a year ago

Walkingdude, do you ever take the salt shaker from your house then pour it on the slugs slithering around on your porch/balcony? I admit I do it! So awful.

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 17:6 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I have done in the past. Eurgh so revolting.

Posted on 9 December 2010 @ 17:53 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I'm pretty afraid of moths, too.

And mice and rats... I didn't mind my sister's old Pet rat, however.

I am a bit queasy about heights.. but it depends on how how and the circumstances of being at that height. Certain stairwells and bridges make me extremely uncomfortable, alllmost hyperventilate-y, because they are far too open in design to the world below. I am able to overcome it, though. I enjoyed rockclimbing in an indoor colorful rock setup thing; I just had to remember to not look Down.

I hate hate hate scientific photographs of blown up, dyed, human interiors, like viruses and a million sperms on an egg and skin abnormalities and spliced miniature but blown up this and that and so on... especially when accompanied by a description of what it is. And, if applicable, the "normal" version of whatever effed up, infected thing it is I'm seeing. These things are absurdly TINY for a Reason. To not be seen by Human Eye.

I am drawn to looking at them, though. Like people are drawn to horror movies and sensationalism in general.

-Vic

Posted on 11 December 2010 @ 5:18 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

OH MY GOD, IT!!!!!

Only recently have I stopped warily eying the bathtub drain Every Single Time I get in... just waiting for that [I shall not mention his name because I'm starting to feel presence behind me) to pull himself out.

I forgot I am extremely frightened of those metallic helium birthday balloons when I have to be alone (or nearly so) with them in a house. They are tall and round at just the point where a real human's head would be (so it's like a person is there, 'specially if you catch them out the corner of your eye) and sway and move across the room without wind. And if there does happen to be a slight gust from an open window, the direction in which they move Always seems to be Toward You. And also, they take Forever to deflate, and so bob around your house for practically months on end, Refusing To Die. But you can't get rid of them, can you, because they were someone's thoughtful special occasion offering to you or someone in your household. Confound it all.

Posted on 11 December 2010 @ 5:23 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I have a social phobia. I try not to let it stop me, went out on a couple of dates recently because one on one I'm fine. But I want to go to this mixer on Saturday and I don't think I'll be able to summon the courage. It's the thought that no one will talk to me and I'll end up just standing there looking and feeling awkward. I just don't know what to do when I don't know anyone. I walk in, it's at a bar so I get a drink, and there's this room full of people all mingling and talking to each other... and what are you supposed to do? How do you get talking to someone? I'll just be standing there looking like a dick. It would just be dreadful. I know it will be dreadful. And it's a pain because I really want to meet people and this sort of thing is how you do it.

Posted on 13 December 2010 @ 9:50 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I know how you feel about the social phobia thing. I have been invited for xmas drinks next week by a friend who is coming to visit. He asked me why i never meet up for a drink when he's back because i always make an excuse not to go.

I hate being around groups of people, especially ones i don't know that well. I want to go and i know if i don't go this time he will get annoyed with me. I'll probably have a bit of dutch courage before hand.

Posted on 13 December 2010 @ 20:51 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I hope you go dude, it won't be so bad if you're with your friend will it?

I have a friend who long ago stopped bothering to ask me to parties and concerts and whatnot, he knew I wouldn't go. Now that I'm fighting this thing I actually WOULD go, and I've tried to tell him that but I guess he's not interested now because I haven't heard back from him.

And one of the women I went on a date with that I really liked is giving me the silent treatment so I'm feeling pretty sorry for myself.

But one of us should be having a good time, so tell your friend to drag you out kicking and screaming if necessary.

Posted on 13 December 2010 @ 21:20 (London time) - permalink
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Tisha-1, posted over a year ago

Hello there, SD and WD, my name's Tisha! Nice to meet you here at this imaginary party where we are going to have a conversation so you can get a little practice before you go.

How do you know the people who are throwing the party?

Posted on 13 December 2010 @ 21:55 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Hey Tisha. That's cool of you but the problem with me is not knowing what to say when I'm talking to someone, I'm actually pretty good at chit-chat. It's how do you get someone to talk to you in the first place. Women tend not to come up to guys standing there on their own and introduce themselves.

I joined an adult social networking site and a young woman emailed me asking if I'd like to get to know her better. She mentioned this mixer they have every month and asked me to come. But now she's ignoring me which is also putting me off because she'll be there.

Posted on 13 December 2010 @ 22:12 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

For me it's going to be hard because it's going to be in a club with most of his friends. It's so ridiculous how i feel so nervous it really is. I think it's because i'm also very self conscious and a bit paranoid about what people think. I HATE being chatted up by random guys and feel like i want to disappear when that happens.

I just want to be "normal" like everyone else and have fun without worrying about the event months before hand.

Posted on 13 December 2010 @ 22:55 (London time) - permalink
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tennisstar88, posted over a year ago

I have this great fear of dying in a horrible auto accident. So I'm extra aware of my surroundings when on the road and obey all the rules of the road.

Posted on 14 December 2010 @ 2:53 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Have you ever spoken to anyone about it dude?

Posted on 14 December 2010 @ 6:27 (London time) - permalink
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C. Grant, posted over a year ago

Strontium, I completely hear you. Cocktail parties. You walk in to the room, there are clusters of people talking to each other. You've walked in alone. It's a nightmare.

Notwithstanding that I don't do this any more than I have to, there are times when it can't be avoided.

Identify a group who don't seem to be cohesive. Get your drink from the bar, move over to the group. If you've assessed them correctly, they'll make space for you. Now you're not standing out alone, you're part of a group. That's the intro -- from there you can make a comment that fits you in, or you can suss out someone who has something to say. For there everything works out, and the party becomes less of a "oh God kill me" moment.

Posted on 14 December 2010 @ 7:21 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Strontium, no i haven't because people who don't have it would just think i'm weird or something. Also, i feel like if i told anyone when i DO go to those places they will be watching me or acting different like i'm some kind of freak.

Posted on 14 December 2010 @ 17:16 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Thanks CG that's good advice, and it's good to know I'm not the only one with this kind of problem. Makes me feel like less of a freak.

Walkin dude, I actually meant someone like a therapist.

Posted on 14 December 2010 @ 23:55 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Oh ok, no i don't really "do" therapy.

Posted on 14 December 2010 @ 23:58 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Doesn't look like i'll be going now anyway.

Posted on 19 December 2010 @ 18:19 (London time) - permalink
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DenimandLace44, posted over a year ago

Awww...I'm sorry hunny. :(

Posted on 20 December 2010 @ 10:26 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Ah, it's cool :) The weather in the UK is pretty bad (snow) and it doesn't look like people will be able to travel down.

Posted on 20 December 2010 @ 22:35 (London time) - permalink
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pixiegirls, posted over a year ago

bummer you aren't going out dude, and know that uncomfortable feeling. I would feel like that a lot, now I'm actually comfortable enough to go into a bar by myself! "Normal" people find that strange since I don't come off as being shy in any sense of the word. Strange what things we are phobic about.

A couple of things that friends of mine have done who had the same issue, and I've tried:

*Memorize some really good sarcastic come backs to avoid some of the random annoying people.

*Start to memorize trivia, sports stats, anything that you might be able to fall back on if silent pauses start popping up.

*This one is strange, but worked for one friend. Pretend to be someone else, change your name if you have to. She found doing this (especially in bars) didn't make her feel paranoid about what people might be thinking. If they were going to be judgmental, it was against her poor character choice, not her personally. (she did eventually learn to just be herself).

*Parroting (another friend's choice): When she felt people were looking at her or judging her in some way, she would look around her and find someone who looked comfortable and begin imitating or parroting her. Took a couple of tries, but she found it so funny, she didn't need to keep it up all the time.

Posted on 23 December 2010 @ 11:48 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Thanks for the tips :) will give it a go. I just feel so ridiculous because when you have a social phobia you feel like you're a child in an adult world because you're hiding behind other people or feel like you just don't belong with these people. It's a really crappy feeling and i hate it.

Posted on 23 December 2010 @ 14:56 (London time) - permalink
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pixiegirls, posted over a year ago

Maybe try things a little at a time. Can only imagine how hard it can be for you being in social situations when you don't feel that comfortable.

You seem to have a great personality that I'm sure many would love to get to know.

Posted on 16 January 2011 @ 8:51 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

hi walking dude

i have seen you quite a bit on this site and read some of your post, i am surprised to hear you say that you have social phobia. you seem to be full of personality and have a 'lot to give' (sounds cheesy that i know but couldn't think of another phrase)

if only you could let that shine through when you are in a social situation. i knew someone who had this same condition and he said it was because he thought he had nothing useful or interesting to say to people is that how you feel? coz if you do, i disagree. its in you - you just have to let it out :) have you thought about what advice you would give to someone who came to you asking for advice if it was them who suffered from this? and have you ever tried therapy for this?

Posted on 16 January 2011 @ 10:43 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Hi, thanks for saying those nice things about me, much appreciated.

My "phobia" isn't really a problem or that obvious unless i'm in new surroundings with people i don't know that well. I just go really quiet and try and take the focus off me and let other people do the talking. Probably look like miserable cow lol.

I think a big part of it is saying something stupid or acting in the "wrong" way. I know that i'm a reasonably intelligent person and have some

interesting views, i just have a fear of sharing them.

When i'm with people i know well and who know me, i'm fine. It's just the getting to know people part.

I've never tried therapy, partly because i know it was probably be cognitive behavioural therapy or CBT, which makes you go into those situations and face them, which i know is the whole point but that's just too terrifying.

Posted on 19 January 2011 @ 21:26 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

i think you are thinking of aversion therapy, and no i wouldn't do that either. my phobia is moths and even butterflies (coz they look and fly like moths!) and believe me i would rather DIE than be close to/touch one/have one on me! i just get round the problem by making sure i don't have the 'lights on-windows open' combo going on, on summer nights! that gets me by. i have done CBT myself (not for the moth thing, i just live with that!)

i found it really good! it teaches you how to feel differently about things, like how to think positively about things instead of the negative 'worst case scenario' thoughts. i don't think they would make you do any practical work, its just about your own thoughts. but you know, loads of people get a bit nervous or stiff around new people, just some are better at hiding it than others

Posted on 19 January 2011 @ 21:50 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I have a huge fear of moths. Butterflies don't bother me but moths i can't go near. Especially those huge black ones night fly near you.

I might think about looking into some kind of therapy. I'm not as bad as i used to be.

Posted on 19 January 2011 @ 22:0 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

*that not night

Posted on 19 January 2011 @ 22:0 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

aw stop it! makes my skin crawl to even think about them! i think i got terrified of them because when i was a little kid my brother had one hidden in his hands and he said ' hey come and see this!' and when i got near him he threw it in my face :/

brothers eh?

Posted on 19 January 2011 @ 22:9 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

If i see one in my room, i get somebody to remove it lol one flew by my ear once and i heard this buzzing noise *shudder*

I keep all my windows closed in the summer to try and avoid them by they still manage to get in.

I also hate daddy long legs or "crane flies".

Posted on 20 January 2011 @ 1:58 (London time) - permalink
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birdynumnums, posted over a year ago

You mentioned public speaking. More people statistically are afraid of public speaking than death - which means at any given funeral - more people would rather be IN the coffin than giving the Eulogy. Gotta love Seinfeld!!!!

Posted on 20 January 2011 @ 2:23 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

Wow thats a bizzare statistic! I have no qualms about public speaking at all - I rather enjoy it actually. I know how rare it is as whenever I work within a group on a presentation they don't mind doing all the work etc but will not do the actual presentation - I do! I do understand that some people hate doing it and I do try to help them too :-)

I don't have any such phobias as such but I'm not keen on snakes or spiders...

Posted on 20 January 2011 @ 11:22 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

ha ha birdy, that's a good one! :)

apparently when you have to give a speech it can make you feel less nervous if you imagine the audience are naked! naked! i'm not sure about that would work!?!

@ walkin dude: its weird how people are scared of tiny creatures isn't it? 'they're more scared of you that you are of them you know' - yeah, right! :) daddy long legs and moths are the most clumsy fliers i think so they've got that 'oh no its gonna end up flying in my face by mistake' factor for me! always think they are gonna get tangled up my hair :( (cringe cringe why am i doing this to myself!?)

Posted on 20 January 2011 @ 20:54 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

and Sofia, hi, sorry, didn't mean to not reply to you, didn't see your post for some reason til had posted my own. your phobias, well, dislikes are normal you know; i find anthropology really interesting and i read that humans now are commonly scared of snakes and spiders coz we have inherited the instinct from our ancestors who would have often come into contact with deadly snakes and spiders.

strangely enough, i am ok with those two, FISH are another terror of mine, but i think i know why it is, my brother chased me with a dead one from the fishmongers when i was little and it scared the s**t out of me! - my brother - yet again! :/

Posted on 20 January 2011 @ 21:6 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

angelDlite: That fish thing made me laugh. I don't have a problem with fish, it's mostly the flying things.

Then again, i don't like frogs either. I think it's the way they move, like when they jump it makes my skin crawl.

My dog used to bring them into the house and they would jump around the kitchen while i was screaming. That was not pleasant i must say.

Posted on 21 January 2011 @ 0:34 (London time) - permalink
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aunt honesty, posted over a year ago

My biggest phobia is spiders i hate them with a passion even the small ones. They are so dam quick hate them. I have a friend who has a really bad phobia of vomiting its quite a strange one but she just totally panicks and cant breathe if she sees someone getting sick even on the tv. If she hears someone even in the toilet she goes in to a complete panick attack so i think i should be greatful mine is only spiders. Well bees and wasps as well and also not a big fan of mice or rats. Yuck.

Posted on 21 January 2011 @ 0:58 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

frogs! my cats bring them in sometimes, so i have to remove them, they are still alive but they play dead! until you go near them and they JUMP! baby ones are quite sweet though :)

hi aunt: my friends mum had a life long phobia of bees (bit of a morbid story this, sorry) anyway, this lady, this mum grew old and dodging to get away from a bee she tripped over and broke her hip, but then, a few years later, she was found unconscious in her kitchen, looks like she had fell again and hit her head on the floor, and there, buzzing around in the kitchen were 2 bees.

she went to hospital but died.

my friend believes that when we have a phobia its because we 'know' that that particular thing is gonna be the thing that kills us in the end :(

Posted on 21 January 2011 @ 1:59 (London time) - permalink
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aunt honesty, posted over a year ago

Wow that is a horrific story the poor woman that is awful.

I dont really believe though that phobias are to do with what will kill us in the end, because many people have many different kinds of phobias. Its all to do with the brain and things that you fear.

I dont even think some people know why they have a fear of something but its in our subcounscious. So dont stay up worrying that a frog is going to kill you. :-)

Posted on 24 January 2011 @ 19:4 (London time) - permalink
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, posted over a year ago

I doubt a frog's going to kill you. Unless you trip over it or it's poisonousness.

I'm terrified of heights, which is another irrational one. Fear of falling would make sense but not heights.

Posted on 24 January 2011 @ 19:50 (London time) - permalink
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aunt honesty, posted over a year ago

Alot of people have a fearof heights as well though. I think its the whole vertigo thing. Fears are funny things really quite hard to grasp.

Posted on 25 January 2011 @ 20:29 (London time) - permalink
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dmartin89, posted over a year ago

II just wanted to add to this post, that as a hypnotherapist, I know that Hypnosis and CBT work wonders with phobias. It is actually one of the most easily curable things, that is if the person wants to be cured!

I suffered from depression since I was about 5 years old, went on antidepressants at 18 then at 21 I became a hypnotherapist. In my first week of training I realised I had a phobia of not being depressed, because of the way it would significantly change my life.

I got rid of that phobia within the day, the depressing within the week and at the end of the month I came off my medication!

Seriously, if I can do it, getting rid of that fear of falling and spiders and fish is a piece of cake :-)

Posted on 26 January 2011 @ 23:48 (London time) - permalink
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angelDlite, posted over a year ago

dmartin: that is interesting. like a fear of being happy (or at least not depressed) i think my mum is a bit the same, we (her kids) tell her she is not happy unless she is worrying about something!

hope you don't mind me asking, since your depression has been rooted from such a YOUNG age, are you better now? has your hypnotherapy training helped you to overcome your depression? i have done CBT myself and i found it really really good, i did not feel it working at the time but i look back now and see that it did. the technique is always available to me now that i have learned it

Posted on 27 January 2011 @ 17:28 (London time) - permalink
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