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Why is this married female coworker playing games?

Tagged as: Crushes, Flirting, Friends<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 September 2018) 6 Answers - (Newest, 23 September 2018)
A male United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

Why would married female coworker who is friendly with everyone shower me with gifts just told me she cheated on her husband before out the blue seeks me out all day but today she invites me to smoke and then ignores me and wouldn't even sit next to me saying she was worried about a coworker coming out on us she was very persistent in getting to know me I would hardly pay her attention now she has all my attention but it's seems like she's playing games?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (23 September 2018):

She is insecure and thrives on getting the attention of men to feel good about herself. Deep down, she is broken and messed up. You are just another distraction from her being unhappy with herself. I'll bet her hubby treats her just fine. She will use you and lose you, if you let her. Be prepared for a big mess if you cave. But if you're smart, you'll IGNORE her.

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom + , writes (22 September 2018):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntCan't disagree with any of the advice given already.

She is pulling your strings to make you dance to her tune - which you are obediently doing.

Perhaps you should ask her husband how you should handle her and whether accepting gifts from her is appropriate? I am sure he will be happy to give you his opinion.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (22 September 2018):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntSeriously? Dude, of course she's playing games. She's married and a cheater. She wants the ego boost, but could easily get you in trouble with your boss.

Stay away from her. No more attention. Never be alone with her or text/call her. Avoid her like the plague, except when you are also around others at the same time.

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A male reader, N91 United Kingdom +, writes (21 September 2018):

N91 agony auntWhy are you even asking?

She’s married - that means she is OFF LIMITS. If she wants to cheat, let her do it with someone else, don’t be an idiot.

You’re at work to do a job that you are paid for. It’s not a dating pool. Quit the high school crap and get on with your job.

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A female reader, Honeypie United States + , writes (21 September 2018):

Honeypie agony auntHonestly?

Stay the Hay-Hay away from her. Be polite, professional but unless you are working together on something... AVOID her like the plague. Do not accept gifts (I would politely return them if I were you, if possible). She was pursuing you hard and now she is dialing it back... Because? Well, either she is a drama queen who likes to play games, or she is trying to get YOU in hot water, or she is just not a very professional person, or she is using you as a smokescreen for something else... why would she feel the need to buy you gifts?

She is married. Probably unhappy at times at home and uses men at work to stroke her ego. And when times are not bad at home, she ignores the men at work.

This can go sideways in SO many ways. Look at what';s going on with Judge Kavanaugh.... Just saying.

I'm a woman and APPALLED that the sentiment is that you SHOULD believe ALL women who accuses a man of inappropriate behavior. Like women don't lie if they stand something to gain?

YOU (as a man) have to be FAR more conscience of YOUR behavior than she does. Because you are a man. Simply.

If you want to make friend with females... Make them OUTSIDE of work, and stick to single women or couples.

Be smart, this is your CAREER.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (21 September 2018):

Sounds like a setup for a sexual-harassment suit. You're being lured into a mess and you better watch your back! Graciously decline the gifts and keep your distance. Remain courteous and professional.

Think smart! She's married, why are you paying her attention? Do people realize what they were hired for anymore? Drama and affairs are not in your job-description. Are they?

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