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Come on people, am I in denial? Is this an obvious one or what?

Tagged as: Dating, Gay relationships, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (21 May 2010) 2 Answers - (Newest, 1 June 2010)
A female United States age 51-59, *ut Feeling writes:

I’m dating a guy who’s most cherished memories are when he was in a band as a singer and both men and women adored him.

1.He’s extremely meticulous about everything he does from dressing to cooking to barbering.

He unconscienably spends hours in the bathroom knowing that

A. I am the female and should be given first preference to it and

B. Its theonly usable bathroom in the house.

2. He is Xtremely homophobic and says he wishes he could find a way to bannish gays from our salon. Yet a few days ago when a gay customer told me that I should come by the club to get an idea of how well attended the gay clubs are by a variety of people from all walks of our society, he (my BF) said ‘I would love go there to see that. I just feel a straight guy would have no interest in who’s gay and who’s not let alone go to a gay club to “SEE”.

3. I’m an accomplished executive working with a major corporate firm and when we’re arguing (to let me know that i’m not the best catch he could possibly have) he’d referrence a gay doctor who was in love with him who would always buy him expensive gifts but that he’s not as accomplished as I am in my career because he made a choice in his life to not be gay and thats why he’s not as far as he could be.

4. He has told me very early in our relationship that he grew up as a young boy wearing his siters undies and that he had even worn them in his adult life as a singer. This is something I doubt he remembers when he’s gay bashing.

5. He never hesitates to remind me whenever we argue that he and I are not a match and that we will never make it. I believe that this is mainly because he prefers a gay relationship.

6. Sex for us is “Without Words”….literally. He never talks and this makes me feel uncomfortable to be myself and alot dissatisfied. when we’re done he’s always disconnect me from the act by saying something like “that was great” or “That was sweet” rather than “YOU are great”

7. When I met his siter for the first time, her first words to me were that my brother grew up in a house filled with women so never mind him being a bit soft. That made me feel as though they know that he’s gay and are apart of the cover up.

8. He has NO stories about women he was in love with prior to me. He references his ex girlfriends as women who loved him.

9. There is no romance in our relationships and unless i outrightly ask him if he loves me, he’d never say it.

10. I observed him watching a shemale movie and he was much too comfortable and curious. He watched it til the end.

Come on people, am i in denial? Is this an obvious one or what?

View related questions: ex girlfriend, his ex, shemale

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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question!

A female reader, Bickycat United Kingdom +, writes (1 June 2010):

And you are still there because.............?

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A female reader, Emilysanswers United Kingdom +, writes (23 May 2010):

To be honest, what's going on in his head is not any of your business.

Your relationship isn't good so leave him and let him find his way in life.

Not everything is as simple as it seems.

But the FACTS are:

He's not good in bed, he's not romantic, he doesn't seem to see this relationship having a future and tells you so.

So the REAL question is, if you are such a successful executive.... Why are you dating a guy like this when you could forget him and do better?

It seems to be because you just can't tear your eyes off his mental trainwreck... and that is not really the basis of a loving relationship is it?

Good Luck!! xx

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