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| | Annalisa's profile:My friends come to me for advise, because in my 30 years I have been through a lot, including heartbreak, loss of loved ones and the joy of marriage and having a baby.
I am a devout Catholic, so have strong principals, but care for and respect people and their choices.
I'm here because I care.
When it comes to sex, I have all the advise you will ever need and no fear to share it!
So ask me anything! |
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| Latest articles: My one childhood memory
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
18 April 2008: I hesitate to write this, as I've only ever told this to my father, my husband and one other close relative... But I hope it might comfort some people and give a little hope. When I was four years old, I had a beautyful dream. I was staying at my No...
Meditation of a monday afternoon
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 April 2008: I sit in contemplation before the Crucifix in my bed-room, having just changed the sheets and tydied up. I plod along a life of financial restrictions, forced to stay at home, because the work I used to do didn't pay enough for childcare. Though...
Sex education for the young and the old!
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 March 2008: Right, people, this is how it works: Men have penises connected to testicles full of sperm, when a man gets aroused, he gets ready to shoot sperm. Women have vaginas, which are connected to a womb and two ovaries. On an average of 9 days a month, ...
How not to become a cheater!
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
6 March 2008: 1- Remember that your partner should be your best friend, so talk to him/her about your worries; 2- Don't let yourself become close friends with a particular person of the opposite sex! The moment you tell another man about problems with yours sp...
Thoughts from a wedding singer........
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
5 February 2008: As an Opera singer, the arrival of spring means I get booked to sing at wedding ceremonies the world over. My problem is I've been getting really emotional recently and my songs have become more actual prayers for the couples I watch getting ...
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So Long Mr. NICE GUY!!! Pt.1
Q. "Nice guys always finish last" This is true in this modern society "Nice Guys" always finish last especially with women. If you're a man reading this (and I hope you are..) you realize this to be true. If you felt that statement was too far fetc...
A. 14 May 2008: Hi, here's a woman's review:
You've given some very helpful points. I was just saying the other day that every relationship needs a little drama to keep us interested! Also, when I met my husband, he was the only man in the room who wasn't tryi... (read in full...)
Why do people get put off more by gay men than women?
Q. Hi. good day! I just want to hear some opinions/comments from people from different sides of the world. It's just that i observe the general community here and even the world (in general) in how they accept homosexuals. Would people agree wit...
A. 12 May 2008: Hello! Well, being a woman, I actually have the opposite reaction: I can relate more to a gay man than to a lesbian, for a start! I work with lots of gay men, both singers and musicians, I know couples who are very much in love and whom I respect ... (read in full...)
How to spice things up in a relationship where sex and oral sex are not an option?
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost one year now and we are both in our 20s. I've chosen to remain a virgin until I am married. It is both a religious and personal choice on my end. My question is this, how do you spice things up with...
A. 12 May 2008: Hi, just a quick note on the religion front:
if you have doubts about religious practices, you might not be well informed on the religion itself. I don't know what type of church you follow, but from personal experience, I've discovered that Cath... (read in full...)
How to spice things up in a relationship where sex and oral sex are not an option?
Q. I've been dating my boyfriend for almost one year now and we are both in our 20s. I've chosen to remain a virgin until I am married. It is both a religious and personal choice on my end. My question is this, how do you spice things up with...
A. 9 May 2008: From a religious point of view, masturbation is unacceptable, unless it helps lead to full sex and procreation.
If you chose not to have sex until you are married and want to stick to it, trying to spice things up won't help, rather, he will be left... (read in full...)
How can I help my girlfriend? I'm the only one to whom she has confided she has been raped.
Q. Hi, my girlfriend recently confided in me that she had been raped, or molested or something of the sort not too long ago, possibly less then a few months ago, she refuses to divulge any details to me, she won't tell me who, when, where, what ...
A. 9 May 2008: Well done for being supportive! However, if the only person she chose to tell is her boyfriend, it might be a sign she wants you to be understanding and not rush her into sex.
Just ask her what she wants of you and whether there is anything she woul... (read in full...)
How can I tell her to return a favour in bed? She's a virgin.
Q. how do you tell your gf to return the favor please when i please her every time but i'm left hangin or should i say stiff.. idk how to she's a virgin and just coming around to being comfortable with this kind of stuff.. can a guy get a hand job mayb...
A. 9 May 2008: It's a good idea to talk about sex away from the act. Phone sex is great for this! Tell her what you would like her to do to you and how much it would please you.
When you are making love, take her hand and place it on your penis, maybe guiding it w... (read in full...)
I'm constantly tired .......help?
Q. I'm always really tired, and i've been to the doctor about it but he basically didn't help. I had a blood test to test for anaemia because i'm pretty pale and faint a lot, but my blood didn't show signs of that type of problem. But it's getting ...
A. 8 May 2008: Do you eat a balanced diet? Salads and fruit will refresh you. If you have problems sleeping, try to spend 30 minutes to an hour exercising, then have a nice shower.
A small banana and a glass of milk before bed time will help you sleep well.
Yoga ... (read in full...)
Some of the do's and dont's for relationships...
Q. We've all have in been relationships and dates, some of which have ended in good terms and some of which have ended badly. And honestly, a relationship takes more than saying the three words, 'I love you.' Mostly the reasons for relationships last ...
A. 8 May 2008: Great advice! Gosh, I think this is the sort of article people should have as a guide before asking questions.
Well done!... (read in full...)
Romantic music for a wedding - ideas please.
Q. Hi, This is probably an unusual one! But I am looking for help in regards to picking out music for an upcoming wedding ceremony! I dont want anything too lonely as it will be lonely enough. But ideas of more romantic tone. The main one I am having ...
A. 7 May 2008: Hi! Spring movement from the Four Seasons is lovely, as Clarey said, but the composer is Vivaldi.
Mozart never wrote anything on the seasons, but there is some lovely work of his on church music! If you have a singer, "Laudate Dominum" is love... (read in full...)
What is the difference between love and hate?
Q. What is the difference between love and hate? I know this seems so obvious but I am so sure it is. I want to hear your deepest most profound musings lol I have this friend that wears on my last nerve, and I think the feeling is mutual lol We ar...
A. 7 May 2008: They say there is a fine line between love and hate. You can love someone so much, because you might have known her for ages, and expect so much from her that when she turns out to be different from what you expect, you can't accept it and resent ... (read in full...)
Any suggestions for achieving a curvier body?
Q. Ive recently lost weight around my legs and bum and dont have much shape to my body. I was wondering is there anyway i can gain a more curvier shape. Any suggestions please? Thanks x...
A. 7 May 2008: Your shape determined by your scheletal structure, for instance, if your pelvis is very wide, you'll have wide hips. I would just suggest that you combine a balanced diet with healthy exercise and let your body be the shape it naturally is. If your ... (read in full...)
Can a guy remain friends after oral sex?!
Q. Can a guy remain friends with a girl who gives him oral sex? How does he control his emotions around her, or is this different than making real love? OK, you guys out there, let's have it!!!...
A. 7 May 2008: Oral or vaginal, sex is sex.
What will affect your and his reactions are the underlying feelings: ie. was there love and affection before the sex or did you just want a bit of fun?
If you're just friends and you thought you'd treat him to a little... (read in full...)
Is he not interested?
Q. he doesnt look me in the eye when we are talking...but when i turn away he looks at me for a couple of seconds..and when i turn back he looks for like a second..and turns back away..i like eye contact!...is he not interested? ...
A. 7 May 2008: Not everyone is comfortable with constant eye contact. He might be shy or just more layed back than you are.
Look to other things in his behaviour for evidence of interest.
Good luck!... (read in full...)
Fingering has not gained us much thrills yet, will stimulating the famous G spot be more pleasurable for her?
Q. my gf is a virgin and we just recently started fooling around.. she gets nothing out of fingering and i've posted about that on here before.. but bc she doesn't get anything out of that would her g-spot not give her anything either?? ...
A. 7 May 2008: First of all, she needs to be relaxed and not worry about whether she's going to come or not.
Second, your technique might be the problem.
Turn her on by kissing her slowly and passionately, run your fingers through her hair, letting your fin... (read in full...)
How should we tell our families that we love each other and are happy together no matter what?
Q. i'm dating this girl that i've been with for over a year now.. and things are soo perfect between us.. she's everything i've wanted and she says i'm everything she's wanted only thing is that our familys don't like us dating.. i'm 19 she is 20 my ...
A. 7 May 2008: Religious families tend to frown upon relationships getting too intense before marriage. You might have to accept that until you are ready to marry, your family will expect you to just date.
If you are serious about her, talking to her parents will... (read in full...)
The way I feel right now, nothing can hurt me more than I’m hurting right now.
Q. 6 months ago i took a trip to Colorado to visit my uncle during my college break. My uncle told me and my family theirs a woman (my dads second cousin) who's related to our family we should visit. I met that woman’s daughter, she is my 3rd cousin. I ...
A. 6 May 2008: Even if the 3rd cousin thing should not be a problem, she doesn't love you and you can't force anybody to love you.
Love is spontaneous and grows from physical attraction. If she only sees you as a relative and nothing more, you're just burning your... (read in full...)
Is there any help available to help stimulate penis growth?
Q. I cannot get married because I have a very small penis. Are there any treatments available to stimulate growth? All help apreciated. thanks....
A. 6 May 2008: Hello,
penis size is a lot like hight and eye-colour: you have to accept what God gave you! You could have extension surgery.
But think about it carefully! Exactly how small are you?
The penis is just a tool for reproduction. You can make love to... (read in full...)
He's my first lover, is his size right? what do other girls like?
Q. My boyfriend is 6 in long and 5.5 in thick. Is that enough to give me optimal pleasure? He is the only person I've been with, so I don't have comparison. Is he what you would call average? Would sex feel better with someone of different ...
A. 2 May 2008: From another girl, your boyfriend's size is perfect.
A bigger penis might hurt and a smaller one might not quite satisfy. But sexual pleasure and satisfaction are down to emotions, variety of positions and ability to do your bit and have fun.
Make ... (read in full...)
I feel rejected because my ex is with a younger woman. Is he self destructing?
Q. Hello - two months ago I broke up with my 40 year old boyfriend but I hoped it would just be a separation. I haven't contacted him and was surprised that he hadn't contacted me but now I have found out that he is seeing a 26 year old girl. I am ...
A. 2 May 2008: Hey, you didn't mind the baggage, so why should she?
I had a wanderful relationship, before my husband, with a man 13 years my senior. I was only 23 and he had a son, a bad back and a simple job as a security guard. His ex-wife claimed he was bori... (read in full...)
I love lots of sex and masturbation, is there something wrong with me?
Q. I am engaged and in a long-term relationship. My fiance and I are able to have sex 3 times per day but I always want more and masturbate to come for the 4th time. I love to have sex with my fiance and masturbate. Do I have a problem? Is this ...
A. 2 May 2008: If your partner is happy to oblige, why worry? I'd be curious to know, though, if you do it three times a day, are they quick sessions? If so, you might just not be satisfied because you haven't reached your peak of orgasm!
You might find that a lo... (read in full...)
My son was accused of attacking a family member, now my husband and I are having problems. Can you please help?
Q. A year back one of my husband's sisters-in-law saaid in front of every one that my son try to attack her. She was telling lies to proove my son wrong in front of all the family members. She is a currupt person, but still all the family members ...
A. 2 May 2008: People do things, they get mad and decide not to talk anymore. It happens all over the world, but once time has passed and emotions have cooled down, it would be good for you all to sit down and talk.
Your husband and his brother really have noth... (read in full...)
Big family matters are creating problems between my husband and myself. Help me please.
Q. My husband and i have a big problem. We have a communication problem between us that's related to big family matters which cause bad fights between us. Because of this, my kids are suffering, it creates a weird atmpsphere sometimes. What shoul...
A. 2 May 2008: You're not telling us what the issues are. Are these family matters arguments with other relatives?
Your relationship with your husband should not be affected by other people. If you have issues with certain family members or situations, don't take... (read in full...)
How Do I Play Hard To Get In a 6 month Relationship?
Q. Hello Friends, please advise me on what I should do. I met a man 6 months ago and we fell deeply in love. Or at least I fell very hard for him and told him this right away, thanks to my vodka tonic. What I liked about him was that he is extr...
A. 2 May 2008: In my experience, by 6 months you should both know whether you want to be together or not and you should be relaxed with each other.
Playing hard to get at this point and at your age is silly, but don't be all over him either! You should be open... (read in full...)
Sitting in front of the TV or computer is the next best thing to relieving stress...or is it.
Q. I hear our wives complain that we men come home and either sit in front of the TV or go onto the computer and play games. It dawned on me, being all stressed out, not sure what to do to fix the problems. I toss and turn in my head, that I realize th...
A. 1 May 2008: Hi! My husband spends ages on the computer, which drives me insane especially because he works in I.T. and I think "Is he never tired of looking at a screan???"
But he makes sure he gives me and the baby lots of cuddles and takes an interest in my d... (read in full...)
Oi vay or what really grinds my gears!
Q. Oi Vay... " My bf won't love me unless i have perfect skin what foundation should i use??%$$%?^%%$" In the fatel words of a n00b.... " lolz " i'm sorry if this sounds like a Peter Griffin Rant about "What really grinds my gears" But WHY? ...
A. 1 May 2008: Hi, Dr V! I think it's a culture (or lack of one) thing. British girls seem born to go on the pull! I have a really hard time finding practical clothes like dungerees for my 1yr old little girl, as everyone seems intent on dressing kids like ... (read in full...)
What are the chances of getting pregnant using a condom? We are going to have sex this summer.
Q. My boyfriend and I have been dating for a year and a half, and in the summer we are planning to have sex. I was wondering is there a good time to do it with a less chance of being pregnant? like where the chances are low? we are planning on usi...
A. 25 April 2008: Hi! On average, the week half way through your cycle is ovulation time, so you're at risk. You should be fine if you make love just after your last day of bleeding or the week up to when your period is expected.
But people vary and there is alwa... (read in full...)
Penetration is incomplete (in depth)? What is wrong?
Q. i thought the hymen was like the bit right at the front of the inside of your vagina...the first time i had sex it was very painful but i didnt bleed and it wasnt really a stabbing pain like everyone says it felt like my gut was being streched. ...
A. 25 April 2008: For your vagina to stretch, you need to be fully relaxed. Do you get wet enough? Depth of penetration also varies with different positions. If you've been making love simply lying on your back with him on top, try swapping and ryde him instead. If ... (read in full...)
Was this checkup done inappropriately by my wife's gynecologist?
Q. I went to a gynocologist when my wife was of 3 month pregnancy.Ultrasound done on his lab in presence of me and doctor asked my wife to meet his chamber which was 30 meter away from his lab for further checkup.Everything was ok.As per our turn I ...
A. 25 April 2008: It sounds like usual procedure, but the doctor could have been more discreet. Is your wife ok with all this?
Most women preferre a female doctor. Suggest she changes to one! In any case, check-ups are never comfortable. I also think that if he had ... (read in full...)
SITE VIDEO: April 2008 video from Andrew
Q. Been a while since we had a video update. Anyone interested in being able to post their replies to the site as YouTube videos??...
A. 25 April 2008: Hi, Andrew, nice to see and hear you!
Unfortunately, I don't have a web-cam, at present, but it's a nice idea!
Lots of love,
Annalisa.... (read in full...)
Guys in marriage (tip-thoughts)
Q. The need to go with her buying stuff for the house: I now understand the importance of going with the wife shopping. I have a 40 pound decoration she wants me to hang over our bed, but she forgot to get the hangers that go with it. Of course, ...
A. 24 April 2008: You poor love! Us women, eh, what can you do?! To be honest, I'm very good at shopping... unlike my husband, who will spend 4 times as much and still forget to buy the milk!
But I know what you mean about us women signing away our lives to rand... (read in full...)
My new wife was not completely honest about her sexual past...how can I look at her the same way?
Q. I am married and recently me and my wife had another conversation about previous partners and experiences. I say "another" conversation because the answer this time around is much different than the first time we talked about it when we were dating. ...
A. 24 April 2008: To be honest, her past is none of your busyness. She must have regretted some of these experiences and felt you would have judged her and left her, if she told you when you were dating. The question is, why has she suddenly decided to open up? Did ... (read in full...)
She is 23 and says she knows nothing about sex. Could this be true?
Q. I am a male 25. My female friend aged 23 says she dont know anything about sex. She dont know what is masturbation and fingering. She doesnt know what sexual urge is.R there such girls present on earth. Is she a girl or what. She says she will lea...
A. 24 April 2008: Could I just add, though, that you have a right to live your life as you want and see fit: you might just want to let this girl get on with her life and find one who thinks more like you. As they say, lots of fish in the sea, and all that...
G... (read in full...)
She is 23 and says she knows nothing about sex. Could this be true?
Q. I am a male 25. My female friend aged 23 says she dont know anything about sex. She dont know what is masturbation and fingering. She doesnt know what sexual urge is.R there such girls present on earth. Is she a girl or what. She says she will lea...
A. 24 April 2008: Some people choose to save themselves for marriage and religions like Christianity and Islam forbid masturbation, so she is relatively normal.
Although I can't relate to her, I know of several girls like her, who are intelligent, lovely people and ... (read in full...)
I cant seem to get that engine started and give him the sex he wants and deserves!
Q. Me and my boyfried have been together for 3 1/2 years we have a beautiful 1 year old little boy, but before all this our sex life was great!! Now it seems like I dont want it as much as he does we have talked, and talked about it but it seems like I ...
A. 24 April 2008: It's natural for your passion levels to go down, after having a baby. Having a little one to look after all day and often at night is very tiring; also, it's the way nature makes sure your child gets all the attention he can get: you're just ... (read in full...)
Porn Wars II-May The Foreskin Be With You
Q. Debates surrounding porn often generate more heat than light and any areas of genuine concern can get blurred when people let their emotions cloud their reason. Porn has always been with us under various guises ever since the cavemen ogled drawings ...
A. 23 April 2008: You're offering food for thought, of course, but I think most people who complain about their partner watching or reading porn, do so because their relationship is affected by it. Leaving morality aside, it might be acceptable for people to seek ... (read in full...)
Am I pregnant or is my cycle changing?
Q. hey guys here's the scenario: well i dont know if im pregnant..im scared to take a test cause each time has been a disappointment.. lets see i dont feel morning sickness but yet my boobs are tender all the time..im about 3wks late im hung...
A. 23 April 2008: Whenever you feel your body is misbehaving, you should consult a doctor. They will be able to tell you if your pregnant, but also do urine and blood tests, which would help assess any possible health problems, hormonal inbalance, or infections.
I... (read in full...)
My obsession with my looks is controlling my entire life and has done for over a year now!
Q. I have some serious issues, which my parents say are in my head but I cant seem to get rid of them. I do not like the way I look anymore, it never use to bother me but for over a year now it really gets me down. Sometimes I think I look good, but ...
A. 23 April 2008: We're all much more critical of ourselves than other people. Something like your eyelids are only noticed if a person's attention is drawn to them by saying "do you think there's something odd about my eyelids?"
I used to be critical of myself, beca... (read in full...)
Are wet sheets normal when having sex or do I really have a problem?
Q. Hi. i know this may sound really stupid but for the last few days when im been having sex the bed sheets are wet after or when we are still doing it. ive not mentiond it to my bf but im really worried as it looks like ive wet myself a little, ive ...
A. 23 April 2008: Wet sheets are a good sign! Women secrete discharge when turned on and during sex, to allow smoothe penetration. As friction increases as man and woman approach clymax, female discharge increases too, that's why your sheets get wet! It's normal and ... (read in full...)
Pregnant at 17, any tips to make my life easier and be prepared for my baby's arrival?
Q. I am 17 and 24 weeks pregnant i am keeping my baby and was with my boyfriend for 2 years but recently he decided that he couldn't cope anymore and we are no longer together. Do you have any tips for how i can make my life easier and make sure i am ...
A. 22 April 2008: First of all, congratulations! I have a little girl and she's my joy!
My advice would be to accept any support offered my family and friends. The first few months are the hardest, because you have to get used to a new life-style. You're likely to f... (read in full...)
The Last Laugh... Is it really on me? ;)
Q. Hi, it's Andy00. I just thought I would share something with all of you. As you all know, I went through a horrible case of heartbreak 10 months ago, after my distance relationship was cut off by the girl I love (it still hurts to this day). But h...
A. 22 April 2008: Hi, Andy! Well done for turning your troubles into a positive and I quite like the song too!
... (read in full...)
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