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... Send Annalisa a private message | | | Annalisa's profile:My friends come to me for advise, because in my 30 years I have been through a lot, including heartbreak, loss of loved ones and the joy of marriage and having a baby.
I am a devout Catholic, so have strong principals, but care for and respect people and their choices.
I'm here because I care.
When it comes to sex, I have all the advise you will ever need and no fear to share it!
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| Latest articles: MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
24 December 2008: To everyone who reads this and especially to those who don't because they're fed up with the season, MERRY CHRISTMAS!!! Let's remember that it is by giving that we receive, with selfless generosity and care that we earn the love and trust of peo...
Good bye, nice meeting you all!
This question has 13 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
10 October 2008: Hi all! Just a quick message to give my love to everybody, as I have decided to leave the site. It's been fun, but I've finally realised that I don't like the Internet and will stick to giving my advice and opinions in person, in future. If you wa...
Pray, pray, pray!
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 October 2008: Hi everyone! We're all here to seek and give advice about our lives getting a little scary, confusing or just to share a few words. I thought I'd mention the importance of prayer: it's important, it helps you focus and it could save your life. ...
Respect for human rights or anarchy?
This question has 1 answer by a reader of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
8 July 2008: Dear friends, yet another murder demands the front page of every news-paper in England. On Facebook, I've been invited to join a group against knife crime, where people try to come up with ideas to stop all this terror and blood shed. Meanwhile...
Is it really a friend, that person you get drunk with every week-end?
This question has 3 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
27 June 2008: I don't know, I wouldn't say I was boring! Although I'm a family girl, married and a mum, I travel around the world a couple of times a year, I go to Rock gigs (Eric Clapton on Saturday!), I perform and I am always up for a party. But most people m...
My one childhood memory
This question has 8 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
18 April 2008: I hesitate to write this, as I've only ever told this to my father, my husband and one other close relative... But I hope it might comfort some people and give a little hope. When I was four years old, I had a beautyful dream. I was staying at my No...
Meditation of a monday afternoon
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
14 April 2008: I sit in contemplation before the Crucifix in my bed-room, having just changed the sheets and tydied up. I plod along a life of financial restrictions, forced to stay at home, because the work I used to do didn't pay enough for childcare. Though...
Sex education for the young and the old!
This question has 4 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
28 March 2008: Right, people, this is how it works: Men have penises connected to testicles full of sperm, when a man gets aroused, he gets ready to shoot sperm. Women have vaginas, which are connected to a womb and two ovaries. On an average of 9 days a month, ...
How not to become a cheater!
This question has 5 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
6 March 2008: 1- Remember that your partner should be your best friend, so talk to him/her about your worries; 2- Don't let yourself become close friends with a particular person of the opposite sex! The moment you tell another man about problems with yours sp...
Thoughts from a wedding singer........
This question has 2 answers by readers of DearCupid.ORG.
Newest answer was posted
5 February 2008: As an Opera singer, the arrival of spring means I get booked to sing at wedding ceremonies the world over. My problem is I've been getting really emotional recently and my songs have become more actual prayers for the couples I watch getting ...
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All the signs of pregnancy but all the tests are coming back negative!
Q. Help! I always have regular periods and i skipped my first ever one two weeks ago! I went to my local family planning clinic a week after it was due to be tested for pregnancy and it came back negative, they told me to wait a week and go back. I ...
A. 26 May 2009: :-) Congratulations then! I wish you all the best and I'll keep you in my prayers :-)... (read in full...)
All the signs of pregnancy but all the tests are coming back negative!
Q. Help! I always have regular periods and i skipped my first ever one two weeks ago! I went to my local family planning clinic a week after it was due to be tested for pregnancy and it came back negative, they told me to wait a week and go back. I ...
A. 22 May 2009: The symptoms you describe are also very common during premenstrual times or when a period is delayed.
However, you need to think of all possibilities. It does make me wonder when people say they would terminate a pregnancy... but clearly didn't thin... (read in full...)
All the signs of pregnancy but all the tests are coming back negative!
Q. Help! I always have regular periods and i skipped my first ever one two weeks ago! I went to my local family planning clinic a week after it was due to be tested for pregnancy and it came back negative, they told me to wait a week and go back. I ...
A. 21 May 2009: When I was your age, I found that sex always affected my periods, so it might just be down to your body readjusting to a new life-style.
However, I'd be inclined to get a full check-up for any possible infections, STDs and of course pregnancy, if y... (read in full...)
Do good looks mean a better life?
Q. do good looking guys have more options of girlfreinds and more freinds and be very popular ...
A. 20 May 2009: I find that a guy that 'looks' good to me relies more on confidence, personality and education than actual facial features, fitness and general physical appearance.
Whilest more women might be attracted to a guy who looks good, they're just as like... (read in full...)
Is this an STD? I'm scared... help!
Q. Ok basically im 18. i was having oral fun with my boyfriend (my 1st) and then his semen was like white/water (maybe precum?) then dark yellow. he even said oh its dark yellow lol... he's only had a sex with some girls and always used protection ...
A. 18 May 2009: Why not just get it checked by a doctor?
Better safe than sorry, I say! It might just be down to spicy food and dehydration, but I've certainly never seen dark yellow semen and I'd be inclined to get him checked.
It might be a simple urine infectio... (read in full...)
Ex-fiance coming by to pick up things, should I be there?
Q. My fiancee just broke up with me last week and ive done NOTHING wrong but she wont see that. The thing that ended it between us is because she found 2 letters in my Outbox to a girl a day before we began even talking to one another and she got ...
A. 13 May 2009: If you love her and want her back, you shouldn't care how much you hurt, you should try to get her back, apologise to her, tell her how you feel!
If you're not bothered, then it's all for the best and you might as well let her get her stuff alon... (read in full...)
Broken up because of family/religion but I can't get over him!
Q. My case might be unique cause I am from a very conservative background. I am a very religious Hindu and i CANNOT go against my parents to marry a guy they disapprove of. But emotions took over me, and i fell in love for a Buddhist guy! He loves me ...
A. 13 May 2009: I was in a similar situation in my early 20s: I am a practicing Catholic and I fell in love with a divorced man... Long story short, same issue as you're facing, just different people.
First of all I have to ask: are you a good Hindu and would you ... (read in full...)
Daughter's relationship worries me
Q. my daughter started a 'relationship'with a 19 year old from pakistan when she was 15.this has all been happening without our knowledge.we have now found out.she is now 16(so 'legally' she can date who she wants)she says she loves him.i am petrified ...
A. 13 May 2009: She's young and at her age love can seem so intense.
You need to give her guidelines and advice, but ultimately you don't know the guy, he could be the best candidate as a partner!
I would suggest that if she's so serious about this relation... (read in full...)
I want to sing but have a confidence issue
Q. Hey guys, I'm sorry that this isn't much of a relationship issue, but i couldn't think of anyone else to ask... Right, my issue is, i want to do something different with my life, i want to sing! And i don't mean in the local forum etc, i mean b...
A. 13 May 2009: I've always been quite shy, but the first step for me was to study music, a musical instrument (which made me confident about my musical skills) and I started taking singing lessons.
Even the most talented of people need to learn from a prof... (read in full...)
I feel like I'm giving 100% and only getting 50% back!
Q. I've had terrible luck with relationships, I always feel like im giving 100% and always getting back 50%. All the girls I date always are "too busy" to have a boyfriend or just dont think im "ready" to have a girlfriend. In relationships I always ...
A. 13 May 2009: Ok, take a breather, sit down, relax... then go out and get a life, have some fun with friends, hobbies, whatever makes you happy!
If you care about people, be there for them and expect nothing in return... BUT being there for someone means bein... (read in full...)
How do I tell a guy I want to get sexual?
Q. I have been on 2 seperate dates with this guy I like. Ive known him for awhile but just recently let him know I liked him. Hes made several sexual comments (nothing involving us two-but hes def not the prudish type). I would have sex with him but...
A. 13 May 2009: You know, I've never had to tell a guy I was ready!
When you go out with him and kiss him good-bye, kiss him passionately, put your arms around him and press your body against him so he can feel your nipples and your body close enough for you to f... (read in full...)
Pregnant, cheated on husband and not sure who the father is
Q. I have been married to this amazing guy for 5 years and i love him with all my heart.we have been trying for a baby for 3 of these years and was told that there is no reason why we could not concieve it would just be a matter of time.anyway after ...
A. 13 May 2009: What matters here is who you love and what makes sense, right?
The child is yours, you love your husband and your husband will be a great dad.
Does it really matter who the biological father is?
Even if it was your friend, it was a one-off, so ... (read in full...)
Why does sex hurt the first time?
Q. why does it hurt the first time you have sex? how do you know your ready? how do know when the right time is? how do you know he's ready, and not doing it to make you happy?...
A. 13 May 2009: 1- First time sex hurts for a girl because the hymen, a flap of tissue that seals your vagina, is stretched and torn during penetration. This only happens once, but you might reexperience pain if you're not relaxed enough.
2- You need to be read... (read in full...)
Why was I wrong to entice older men?
Q. I started having sex when I was 13, and every one of my partners were adult men. There was no coercion or force involved in any of them. I consented to the encounters, and I initiated the sex on each occasion. This did not negatively impact my life. ...
A. 13 May 2009: It was wrong for the men to take advantage of a child and it cost you your childhood innocence. It's all in the past, so why worry? Certainly, everybody needs years to learn about relationships, so rushing into sexual relationships to... (read in full...)
I'm in love with my second cousin... she's getting married but I promised myself I would tell her
Q. I know I will be judged for this, and I know that it will be difficult for some to try and think of this in an unbiased manner. But I wish to say in my defense three things: 1.) There is no law against a relationship of this type. 2.) The...
A. 13 May 2009: Ok, let's forget you're related and look at this objectively: She's having someone else's child, so presumably she's in love with the baby's father. Where does that leave you? A pregnant woman is very sensitive and doesn't need this kind of stress... (read in full...)
Best place to lose your virginity?
Q. I'm ready, and I'm gonna lose it. The question is where? Ideas anyone? The beach? The woods? Not some sleazy hotel room or my bed. This is the first time you'll always remember. I want to make it memorable in so many different ways, and...
A. 12 May 2009: As the first time tends to be a bit painful, unsatisfying... it's best to go for somewhere comfortable where you can go for a missionary position without fear of bugs... and if you go for the beach, sand could corrode the condom, so I would not ... (read in full...)
I've lied so much to him..I can't get out of this unless I dump him!
Q. I just met this guy recently, he's basically everything I've wanted in a man. But we met online (and have met in person several times) and it was a result of my posting, and I originally only did it as a joke and I said I was older than I was, ...
A. 11 May 2009: You need to stop lying, so why tell more fibbs to get out of it?
I think you need to come clean and be honest about the way you feel. If you can't do it in person, write him a letter and end it by saying you would understand if he never wanted to s... (read in full...)
Is there any help for people like me out there?
Q. I don't know what to do anymore, I'm at the end of my tether. I lost my job in September last year. I worked there for four months after leaving my previous job after five years. The company I moved to was meant to be training me to be one of their ...
A. 8 May 2009: If you've been dismissed rather than resigned, you're at least entitled to job-seeker's allowance.
I'd also be inclined to look up local jobs of all sorts and temping. Use news-papers rather than agencies that might charge to find you jobs.
I kno... (read in full...)
My fiance hasn't even told his mum that we have set a date for our wedding!
Q. the problem is my fiance and me have booked our wedding for next year. And i asked him if he had told his mum as he sees her more than me and he said he hasnt when i asked him why he said i told her before we was getting married. which i dont ...
A. 7 May 2009: I can't help wandering how you came to be engaged. I mean, did he propose or did you drop enough hints for him to feel he had to?
Why are you getting married?
If you feel unsure, maybe you should sit down and discuss it all with him, making s... (read in full...)
We lost our baby the first time, now I am scared to try again
Q. Im 21 and i been in a relationship with this man thats 28 for 3 years and we had a daughter that passed away. The pregnacy came unexpected and at first he didnt want kids then he wanted them. Now he wants to try again and i am really scared to go ...
A. 6 May 2009: Raising a family is something you both need to agree on.
Talk it through with him... not just getting pregnant again, but also about what you want out of life and where your relationship fits into this.
You have to want a baby: you should not feel... (read in full...)
Facebook about to ruin another relationship?
Q. I would really appreciate people's opinions / advice on this particular dilemma...Nothing new, but I'm sure lots of people have had similar experiences. Damn facebook... Me and my girlfriend (both early 30s) have had some problems lately but we ar...
A. 6 May 2009: She may be doing this just to feel good about herself, but it isn't right, especially if it makes you uncomfortable.
I'd confront her and calmly tell her you're not happy about the situation.
If she values your relationship, she'll drop this guy... (read in full...)
Can't stop thinking about my bf's friend! Is this fair to my bf-should we break up??
Q. I'm 20 years old. I have been with my partner for 4 years and have two children with him. and i do love him. but since i was at school i have liked one of his friends. and all of a sudden this friend is spending a lot of time with our family and i ...
A. 4 May 2009: It's easy to take a nice person at face value and wish you were with them, when with your current partner you share problems, bills, stress and routine.
Your solutions are both flawed:
-pretending things are ok will only close you up even more to ... (read in full...)
My bf left me, and I have 6 kids! What should I do?
Q. i woke up this morning and my boyfriend has left me.we had a big argument last night and i said things i didnt mean. He wanted to sort things out and said he didnt mean the things he said but i just went to bed. I've just got up and hes gone. He's ...
A. 4 May 2009: Call him, show you put him before your disagreements with his mother... actually, trying to get on with your his mother would be a good start!
Try your best to talk to him, learn to swallow your pride and discuss issues constructively instead of a... (read in full...)
I want this marriage to work! How do I let him know how sorry I am?
Q. Hey guys, I really need some serious advice here. So I'm legally married but my husband has been incarcerated for almost seven months now. Our relationship was a little rocky before the incarceration because we weren't living together and I was ...
A. 4 May 2009: Hmmm...
Well, apologysing, telling him you're pregnant but don't want to make this innocent baby pay for your mistakes and just telling him you love him and want him back should be enough.
Discuss with him whether things could work between you if y... (read in full...)
He's a year younger..should I date him?
Q. hey everyone,i am 18 years old.. i met this guy through a common friend.. he actually goes to the same school as me,but he is 1 year younger than me.. i like him,but i think he's too young.. should i go for it?? thanks in advance.....
A. 4 May 2009: Do you think he's too young because of his age or do you actually think his behaviour less mature than yours?
A good relationship relies on common interests and vibes... you know?
If you admire him as a person and enjoy spending time with him, a y... (read in full...)
How do I tell my dad I'm pregnant?
Q. I have to tell my dad i'm pregnant tonight, and I havn't got a clue how to start the conversation. How would you react if your 17 year old daughter told you she was pregnant? I took precautions, and still ended up in this situation, so i'm hoping ...
A. 29 April 2009: First of all, congratulations :-)
I think your dad's reaction depends on how he raised you.
Did he raise you as a religious girl with the whole 'no sex before marriage' talks?
In this case precautions won't cover it.
Did he talk to you about saf... (read in full...)
Should I visit my g/f's kid's dad in prison with her?
Q. my girlfriend has two kids . her baby dad is in prison. his mother is going to visit him soon but she wants my girfriend and her kids to come . i don't mind the kids going to visit their dad.but my girlfriend wants to go also. she's said if I ...
A. 29 April 2009: I think you should let her go with the kids, they're still young and can be easily impressionable.
On her part, however, she should talk to him without the kids there and put him in his place.
Rather than giving her a hard time about going, j... (read in full...)
Should I visit my g/f's kid's dad in prison with her?
Q. my girlfriend has two kids . her baby dad is in prison. his mother is going to visit him soon but she wants my girfriend and her kids to come . i don't mind the kids going to visit their dad.but my girlfriend wants to go also. she's said if I ...
A. 29 April 2009: If I was in her shoes, I would want to be with my kids when they see their father in prison.
As for you, whilest on one hand you need to accept that the kids will always be a link with her ex, you don't need to visit him too, unless you want to be t... (read in full...)
My partner raped me when I was pregnant
Q. i am 21 yrs old and uptill a few months ago had blocked out being raped twice by my partner while i was pregnant, to be honest throughout the pregnancy i was num so didnt really know how to eel but now i'm getting stronger and my confidence is ...
A. 24 April 2009: I'm sure it felt horrible, but if you think he's a decent guy and you love each other, mistakes can be worked through, you know?
Have you talked about this?
Talking through your feelings will give him the opportunity to not only apologise, but work... (read in full...)
Am I immature and difficult or just another common misunderstanding?
Q. Well, my boyfriend and I are filling in applications for college, and since he's been putting off doing his personal statement for a few weeks now, I offered to do it for him... I looked up some things that might be important to mention and asked ...
A. 24 April 2009: Surely you're being a little unreasonable:
to help someone doesn't mean taking over their responsability!
I think it was wrong for you to take over in the first place, you should just have offered to help... which means to do some of the work and... (read in full...)
Does he really love me or what?
Q. I am a 32yr old out gay male, I am married that happened before I could admit that I was gay, she knows we are together for the kids, my problem is that I have fallen in love with this guy i work with he is 18 and straight. He knows how I feel and ...
A. 24 April 2009: At 18 he's very young and still relatively inexperienced, therefore understandably confused and scared about a possible gay life choice.
It sounds like he might feel a need for emotional support and closeness in his life and that in you he has foun... (read in full...)
Effectiveness on Implanon contraceptive?
Q. Hey aunts and uncles I'm on the implanon contraceptive (rod in my arm) when i went on to this type of birth control the doctor told me it was completely effective and the risk of getting pregnant was something like 0.05% however im getting worri...
A. 23 April 2009: I've looked it up and it's pretty effective, as 1 woman or less out of every 100 still manages to get pregnant every year... But 1 woman in every 100 is 10 in 1000, 100 in 10000... See where I'm going with this?
I think your course of action shou... (read in full...)
Eye glass fetish anyone?
Q. I need to know more about my partners fetish for women wearing eye glasses(not sun glasses).Do any other women have partners with this fetish,or are there any men who have this fetish?What is it about the glasses that do it for him!Also i don't need ...
A. 23 April 2009: HAHA! At first I thought I read 'glass eye'! Sorry...
Yeah, well, I think men liking women with glasses is ok, he probably just thinks they look intelligent or may even remind him of a teacher or librarian he fancied as a student!
I wear glasses ... (read in full...)
Somehow I got pregnant and I'm just not sure what to do!
Q. I'm 17, and i've just found out i'm pregnant. I really can't understand how, as I was on the pill, and even the doctor said it just doesn't add up. But after not having my bleed after day 21, I knew there must be something wrong, and so took 3 ...
A. 22 April 2009: Abortion isn't the only way out, so if you don't like the idea, calm down and think hard.
Unfortunately contraception can be deceptive, because most people think it's 100% reliable and actually it isn't, it's about 96 or 98%... You just happ... (read in full...)
Second child is on the way and I am worried about the consequences "down there"
Q. Ok,i am going to have my 2nd child in 2 months time and am worried about what"damage" this may have"down below".My partner says that after the birth of our 1st child he felt no difference,but i'm not so sure as i can feel with my fingers that there ...
A. 22 April 2009: Hi :-)
I know you want male advice, really, but I thought I'd mention that you can make your vagina feel tighter simply by squeezing your vaginal muscles when he penetrates you!
Practice without him and with him, as doing it regularly will make you... (read in full...)
I'm not on birth control. Can I get pregnant?
Q. I'm not on birth control but when I have sex with my boyfriend he doesn't ejaculate inside my vagina. He normally ejaculates on my stomach but last weekend he was a bit slow pulling out and some of his sperm went in me. It was mostly outside but ...
A. 21 April 2009: Whilest a jet of sperm contains millions of single swimmers, it only takes one to conceive, so yes, you're taking a huge risk.
All you're doing is cutting down the chances of falling pregnant, not actually being careful!
I would suggest that you... (read in full...)
I had tubal ligation, but could I be pregnant?
Q. I would really love some feedback about this, it is important. 7 years ago I had a tubal ligation done, but last month I found out I was pregnant only it was in my tubes. Now it's the following month and I am experiencing some of the same symp...
A. 21 April 2009: I dare only suggest you see a doctor, take a pregnancy test and check every possible cause for these symptoms.
Whether you're pregnant or not, it's likely you need some medical advice any way, so go for it and let us know :-)
Good luck!... (read in full...)
Do women get more turned on by men taking the lead in the bedroom?
Q. I think the title says it all really, but is it true? Provided us men do the right thing and ask what the woman wants obviously, is it hotter and more of a turn on for women when men take control and lead when it comes to sex?...
A. 21 April 2009: Provided the man is passionate and good at recognising what works and what doesn't... YEAH!!!... (read in full...)
I saw my grandma in a dream...
Q. My grandma passed away last week (Tuesday) from cancer. I was somewhat prepared for this, but not really cuz she seemed alright even though she was very weak. Last night I had a dream that I was in Florida, which is where my grandma and auntie ...
A. 17 April 2009: A similar thing happened to me when I was 4 and the next day I found out my mum had died. She appeared to my dad some days later too, in the night.
It's possible and it's not necessarily down to your conscience.
My mum was seen by a group of peopl... (read in full...)
Why does he not like giving me oral sex?
Q. This guy I've been seeing is completely uninterested in giving me oral sex!! I give it to him every single time we're together but when I ask him if he'll reciprocate, he says he does a good enough job with his hand and no thanks. What is u...
A. 17 April 2009: You know, some people just don't like giving oral sex, full stop.
Maybe he's not as confident with his mouth as he is with his hands, maybe he doesn't like hair in his teeth, maybe he'd rather look you in the eyes and kiss you while he touches you!... (read in full...)
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