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female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: If a guy is cheating on his girlfriend, why would he not leave her?He obviously is not the right man for her. So, why not just leave her, let her find a better man for her, instead of hang onto her knowing he is hurting her?Clearly a relationship is over once a man feels the need to cheat.Maybe you can help me understand. Men especially. Why would you hang onto your girlfriend even if you're having sex with other women? Why would you even need her in your life if you are having sex elsewhere? Reply to this Question
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male
reader, Riot2017  +, writes (31 August 2017):
Simple.Some men can compartmentalize sex and emotions. With one woman, they get their emotional needs met, you could say they "love" those woman, but perhaps the sex is not great. The guys who cheat their girlfriends, they have the need for thrill (that cheating brings), as well as the perks of great sex with other woman. He can have the best of two women without a problem. I wrote "love" between quotes, because when a man really loves a woman and it's a gentleman, he sticks with her, regardless of the quality of sex. Now, please note that not all men are that way, and not all women are there to be part of men that way. I knew a guy that didn't loved women, and he compartmentalized his life by juggling with 5 different girlfriends at the same time without conflicts and without them meeting each other by some magical and impossible reason. He only used those girls for sex and that's it. Those are very extreme cases and not representative or all men.When your BF cheats on you for sex with another girl, it's time to move on, not only because he will keep cheating on you, but because he doesn't really loves you that much to stay on a committed relationship. A guy that cheats you is a guy that's not worthy of you spending your life with.Best luck!
A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (31 August 2017):
 I don't know the answer to your question, but I have witnessed lots off men cheat on their girlfriends throughout their relationship and then propose and get married and have a family but some will stop and some won't. Some guys like the thrill off having no strings attached sex with a woman on the side.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 August 2017): People tend to think it is okay not to tel the truth, and if they keep things a secret then people cannot get hurt by what they do not know. We men usually do carry guilt after cheating and some may stop as soon as they feel terrible and be honedt to there girlfriend but some arent, if men tend to carry that guilt but will not end thier realationship ut is because they still have feelings fir thier girlfriend and do not want her to hurt or just do not want the drama of a breakup. It sounds harsh and i know it is, but its the truth and something we have to live with, people make mistakes and this can be one of them, its looking for forgiveness that we tend to stuggle with
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A
male
reader, Denizen  +, writes (31 August 2017):
 There is another long running question/answer string, Question ID: 334473, which you might want to look at.
Essentially the dialogue falls between women not feeling they are getting the love and tenderness they want, and men feeling the women no longer are the seductress they first fell in love with. Hence their sexual life goes stale.
That may well be the reason this man is looking elsewhere for sexual contact while keeping his reliable long-term partner on hold.
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A
male
reader, judgedick  +, writes (31 August 2017):
 This IS LIKE THE question Why do rich people steal! and I can go on with many other examples of people that don't need but take like some people that seem to be born cleptomaniacs, It is a mix of thinking they can get away with it and some inbuilt need for the excitement the thrill of being able to seduce and all that goes with that,why do some people become alcoholics while others never drink,the old thinking was that they don't put an effort in, But now being an alcoholic is looked on as an illness and may be someday we will look on cheating as an illness, I am a big one on figures and statistics and the statistics on this one is shocking and I hope they are not true, Men SEEM TO DO IT MORE THAN WOMEN but I think that women are catching up fast when you think about it the pill is a new thing and women are only starting to look at things more like men, Some people think and say IT WAS ONLY SEX which brings us to the one that for many of us we need to have an emotional link with the person to become intimate with them but these others can have sex without feeling love and they go so far and say I love you or I MAKE LOVE TO YOU and I have sex with her, this thinking is so far out of the box for the rest of us that we can't come to terms with it,there are so many different types of people out there, like wife beaters, the best friend I ever had the type friend you would do anything for was an alcoholic and a wife beater and his wife used to ask me "DO I HAVE SOME JEAN IN ME THAT MAKES ME FALL FOR A BEATER?" as if to say there is a shoe for every foot that wife beaters go for a type of woman that she is more open to accepting it,that is bringing us into some very deep phycological questions that I think even the best-trained people can't answer, when I was dealing with my friend and his wife I had to find out all types of information and was told that a wife has to on av leave six times before they go for good, but you and I KNOW SOME WIFES STAY MUCH LONGER,From your post, it looks like you are going through a lot of pain right now dealing with the let down of finding out the one you loved has stabbed you in the back in this way, YOU HAVE TO GO THROUGH THE HOLE PROCESS of morning your relationship in the same way with the same steps as a person that has lost their loved one through a sudden death, My heart goes out to any one that finds them self in the same place as you and hope you come through it ok, and not end up thinking all men are bad, some are we are not all like this,I can't give you the insight you are looking for as I have never cheated, but I know the time I was dealing with my friend and his wife my wife started to think that I was cheating on her, and I think my wife might still have so little idea that there was something going on.if you feel you need help even just a little it would be well worth seeing a Profesional that you can talk to face to face, it is always sad to see someone as young as you start your life off with this type experance
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A
female
reader, Miss.Cupid  +, writes (31 August 2017):
 I believe the reason why they cheat is because theres something in that relationship they lack. Maybe the fun, excitement. Once a relationship reaches a comfortable zone the guy feels like their girl doesn't do the things they used to. Like wild sex, wild attitude. But the reason they cheat is because they find that excitement in other women. however, they love the girl they're with so they keep her because thats the comfort zone or maybe they just don't want to hurt them?
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A
female
reader, Honeypie + ♥, writes (31 August 2017):
 Are you the GF or the woman on the side?
As for why guys hang on to a GF while cheating on her - well I think there is a multitude of answers there.
1. She is the woman he can SEE himself settling down with (eventually) so holding onto her while doing "whomever" on the side would make "sense".
2. He has been with his GF for a long time and isn't really willing to INVEST the same kind of time in someone "new".
3. They are financially tied to each other - bought a house together, are in a long term lease, etc.
4. He knows she deserves better but doesn't want someone else to "have" her.
5. He owes her money, she owes him money.
6. She is the breadwinner. He can't have the lifestyle he has without her.
7. He is the breadwinner and he can't kick her out as he feels sorry for her and guilty for cheating.
Those were just some... there are (I'm sure) many many more.
The questions should perhaps be:
If the GF knows he is cheating... why does she stay?
Or
If the woman on the side knows he is cheating on his GF why is she dating that piece of shit?
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